


Geronimo

by charmenna



Series: Geronimo & Primadonna [2]
Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, F/F, cisgirl! au, girl au, more characters will be added later on
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-24
Updated: 2017-07-18
Packaged: 2018-10-23 15:28:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 36,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10722099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charmenna/pseuds/charmenna
Summary: Trixie couldn't wait to get out of her tiny town and head over to Boston University. That's where she met Katya, the loopy art history professor that seemed suspiciously young for her job, and she made Trixie's heart ache with want. When you're trying to start a new life for yourself, why not fall in love with your teacher? Come on, it's fun. It has to be. FEM!AU





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! Surprise, it's me with another Trixya fic (like we don't have enough of those). So, I typed this out in one evening - apparently I was feeling mighty inspired. If you want me to continue this fic, or think it's absolut trash - let a girl know! This is going to be a roller coaster, so get ready for some classic Trixya angst and fluff. As always, happy readings my doves!

Trixie was excited beyond belief to attend college. The only thing she had been questioning when she had packed up her room at home was whether the small-town girl in her could handle travelling to the big city. It seemed like such a cliché, but the factual truth was that she was about to embark onto something she had never even seen before, only in movies. Her old town was basically one street, there was nothing but the absolute necessities for the people that lived there. Trixie had been one of those girls that not only wanted to get out, but needed to. She had always been viewed as different, not only because she refused to conform to the typical flannel wearing, deer shooting and beer drinking lifestyles of every person at home. People would often remind her that there wasn’t necessarily anything wrong with the way they chose to lead their lives, and Trixie agreed – but for her, nothing seemed less interesting than that. She wanted to study art and be in an environment where her liking girls wasn’t the only thing that defined her.

If she had known everything that would transpire at Boston University, she might have been tempted to choose another school – but at the same time, in retrospect, it was the most exciting part of her life and it was where she had met _her._ Her with a capital ‘H’. The only person that mattered, the only person Trixie would have been willing to sacrifice everything for; and as it turned out, she would have to stand by her word on that one.

Her parents had shelled out on her university education, they seemed to want her out as much as she did. They had never been close, Trixie assumed it was because they could never understand her. Her parents however, thought it would do her some good to get out of their house. Trixie had never been unpopular, simply because her father was the mayor of their town and she knew how to throw some wicked parties. Despite of this, few people chose to get to know the real woman behind all the makeup and the big, blonde hair. They thought she was strange, always leaning towards the disturbing jokes and complaining about this and that. Of course, her being one of the only openly gay people there certainly didn’t help when you tried to fit in. But she could party and she could be lavish, to Trixie, that must outweigh everything else once she got the hell out of dodge.

 

* * *

 

 

Driving up to school had been a tedious ride, Trixie only half-listening to her parents Don and Valerie nagging on and on about what she could expect from her first days of school. Trixie had opted against throwing a good bye-party in her own honour, she didn’t know who would be interested in showing up once they knew she wouldn’t be around anymore for free drinks and a kick ass game of beer pong. She was perfectly aware of the fact that she didn’t have many friends, but her time was coming rapidly.

Once they were on campus, her dad pulled their car into the parking lot and let out a content sigh as he glanced back at Trixie in the rear-view mirror. “We’re here, darling.” He beamed, prompting his daughter to roll her brown eyes. “Don’t get sentimental dad, it’s not like you’ll never see me again.”

“Trixie!” her mother gasped. “This is a huge deal for you! I only wish your brother would have come today, but you know, Vanessa needed him at home to get the wedding in order.”

Trixie’s mother seemed to have found the daughter she had always wanted in her brother Brian’s fiancée. Vanessa was sweet, very country and Trixie had absolutely nothing in common with her. “Yeah, I know. You’ll send me pictures from the wedding, it’ll be fine.” She replied, trying yet again to insert the idea of her skipping Brian’s wedding into her parents’ minds. “You’re coming to the wedding. Just because you’re going to college doesn’t give you a free pass to never come home again. Give it a few days and you will be home sick.” Her father retorted as they stepped out of their car, boxes in hand. Trixie knew from experience that there was nothing about her home that enticed her, once she was out she was out – there was no way around it.

“We’ll see dad. Now, I’m at the freshman housing, I think it’s that way.” She pointed to her right after having analysed the map of campus several times on their way over. They trotted along, now and again seeing students that seemed as nervous as Trixie felt on the inside. She straightened her pink sundress, hoping it wouldn’t crease on the box she had in her arms. Her dad pulled all her heavy luggage, complaining several times as he pushed her bags along. “You know, I don’t get why we didn’t just park over at the housing.”

“Don, I’ve already told you – you can’t park there! Besides, it’s good for Trixie to get acquainted with the campus right away.” Her mother seethed. Trixie could barely hear a word they said as she stared in awe at the huge buildings in front of her, it seemed inconceivable that she was finally there. Once they arrived at the huge building that was the freshman housing, Trixie’s parents were sweaty and mildly irritated, and Trixie was ecstatic. A group of people had formed around a couple of guides, and they were handing out housing arrangements, in case anyone had forgotten their room number – of course, Trixie had memorized her own as soon as she had gotten the acceptance letter. Room 319, apparently shared with a girl named Kim. Trixie only hoped that they would get along, seeing as her new life required new friends as well.

“Come on Trixie, don’t wait for the grass to grow!” her dad scowled, causing Trixie’s cheeks to flush as some of the students turned around to look at her amusedly. “Dad!” she exclaimed, whilst quickly turning around to head into the building. They located her room rather quickly, zipping past students cheering and greeting each other. There seemed to be a party down the hall, she needed to get to it later.

Her room was small, smaller than she would have preferred, the other side of it was covered in loud, K-Pop posters and of course, her new roommate. “Hi, I’m Trixie!” she set down her box of things in the middle of the room as she walked towards the other girl, an extended arm leading her way. “I’m Kim!” the other girl awkwardly captured her hand, prompting a shy smile out of Trixie. Kim looked interesting, to say the least. Her white blouse had huge frills on the shoulders and the black skirt she had on seemed way too dressy for the first day of school. Trixie immediately loved her. “So, these are some famous first words – looks like we’re roomies!” she joked, eliciting a grin out of Kim.

“Yeah, I’m sorry for the explosion of things; I needed to feel more at home like, five minutes ago.” Kim explained, a slight lisp to her voice. Trixie waved her off, a snort emitting from her pink lips. “Don’t sweat it, I’m about to unload a whole pink fantasy on you.”

The girls chatted as Trixie’s parents unpacked some of her things, her mother making her bed meticulously. When Trixie’s dad tapped her on the shoulder, they had already gotten most of her things out. “We’re heading out now honey.”

Trixie felt a sudden pang in her chest, but refused to expose herself as she hugged her parents. It felt strange seeing them wave her off before heading out, she had never not lived with them close by, watching her every move. Once she and Kim had settled in a bit and had gotten some food in their growling stomachs, they chatted on for hours on end. Kim was apparently taking a lot of the same courses as Trixie, which was a relief. They sat on their carpeted floor, ignoring the mildly disturbing feeling of sitting where other students before them had done God knows what. “I heard the art history teacher is really good, apparently, she’s from Russia.” Kim informed her whilst brushing her dark hair.

Trixie raised a brow, not entirely sure what she had been picturing when she thought of her teachers. “Oh really? Do you think she’s one of those uptight people, like, I picture history teachers at universities to have a serious Robert Langdon-complex?” The only reason she had signed up for art history was because she needed it to get her degree, she could barely stay awake throughout most of her history lessons at home, so she had very low expectations of what she would be forced to endure here.

“My friend Naomi is a sophomore here, she told me that everyone loves Ms. Zamo, she’s just a free spirit. She is also the head of the Wiccan group on campus, which apparently explains a lot.” Kim chuckled. Trixie shook her head, not quite sure what to think of her choice in courses.

“Isn’t wiccan groups just an excuse for lesbians to get together once a week?” she asked innocently, twiddling a blonde strand around her fingers as she leaned back onto her bed.

“Why, are you looking to join?” Kim teased her, an arched brow cocked. Trixie flushed, not knowing if this was the right time to expose her sexuality to Kim; she didn’t want to scare her away right away, like she had so many times before. Kim seemed to have noticed her flush as she tossed a pillow onto Trixie’s lap. “Hey, don’t worry – if it makes it any easier, I’m bi.”

Trixie felt her shoulders drop down to a more comfortable level as she smirked and tossed the pillow back across the room at Kim. “I didn’t know I was that obvious, my poker face isn’t what it used to be.”

“The first one to crack a gay joke is usually the one who’s munches on the regular, Trixie. Besides, I could spot you from a mile away. My gay-dar is impeccable.” Kim tried her best to make her comfortable, and it worked. Trixie knew coming here was the right choice for her. “My home town is literally two blocks all together surrounding a church, I haven’t been munching on anything – who knows what people can do with pitch forks, you know?” Trixie grunted. The lack of privacy in a small town certainly reflected on her lack of a love life, and the fact that everyone back home was highly religious, which didn’t bode well for her. Her parents had always claimed to not be ashamed of who Trixie was, but her extended family always made a point of telling her father that Trixie might cost him the next election. Trixie’s dad usually replied that if anyone would ever care enough to arrange a proper election, he would take it into consideration, maybe ship Trixie off to an island somewhere. She loved her dad, especially so when he defended her like that. At times, it felt like he and her mom were the only ones that did.

“Oh, so you had a rough time at home?” Kim asked her sympathetically, apparently thinking that the two girls already knew each other well enough for Trixie to spill her guts to her. She normally wouldn’t, but she figured that her story was safe enough with Kim. “I don’t know. I mean, my dad is the mayor – so, any party I throw when they’re out of town typically draws in a large crowd, but I don’t think anyone would want to stay in touch with me now that we’re graduated and all that. It’s been okay that I’m gay if we never talked about it and I continued to support my friends’ drinking habits. It’s just one of those things, I guess.” She shrugged, looking down on her toes that drew across their thick carpet.

“That’s such a shame, Trixie. Maybe you’re reading too much into it though, they might not be as irked about the gay thing as you think they are.” Kim tried to console her, but only got a snort out of the blonde. “I was sort of popular because my parents have a nicer house than most of them have, but whenever I brought up that I liked a girl or something – dead silence.” Trixie gestured with her hands, drawing a straight line into the air. A smirk appeared on her face, knowing that she wouldn’t have to be around a bunch of people that didn’t support her any more. It made all the difference in the world for her, not having to pretend to like all the people that showed up to her house and then spent the rest of the evening dodging her. She knew that she was in a strange position, to have been so out and yet so in at the same time – it was a mystery to her how that had worked out in her favour. At least she hadn’t been alone on the weekends, that must count for something?

Eventually, the girls tired and decided to head for bed. Trixie spent the night tossing and turning, listening to Kim’s steady breaths from across the room. She hoped that tomorrow would be a good day for her, lord knows she needed it.

 

* * *

 

 

The next morning, she got up out of bed springing immediately into action as she pulled through her closet, searching for the perfect outfit to wear on her first day as a college student. She decided on a yellow, flowy dress and a pair of matching ballerinas. She pinned her hair into a loose ponytail and meticulously put on her make up before she decided to be ready. Or, as ready as she would get. Kim finally dragged herself out of bed, and went through the same process as Trixie grabbed a juice and an apple from their mini-fridge. It seemed like her parents had stuffed it to the brim with various breakfast items, something that Trixie was eternally grateful for right about then.

“So, let’s head to art history – I want to see this wiccan teacher for myself.” Trixie cheerfully strutted out of their room, a tired Kim in tow.

Ms. Zamo’s classroom filled up quickly, apparently, more people were interested in such a boring subject than Trixie could have ever expected. She sat down in one of the seats, pulling her pink notebook out of her backpack and placed it neatly on the small conjoined bench in front of her. Her pencils were sharpened; her focus was heightened and her jaw dropped as soon as her teacher strolled to the front. A mess of curly, sandy-blonde hair stuck out of the hairclip the professor had fastened onto her scalp, the dress she wore was long, black and filled with embroidered flowers. However, it wasn’t until Ms. Zamo turned around that Trixie could feel her pulse quicken. She was gorgeous, her sharp cheekbones accentuated by a sloppy contour, the only thing about her makeup that seemed more pristine was her red lips and smoky eyes. The black colour of her eyeshadow brought out her brilliant blue eyes as they darted around behind her large glasses. Her arched eyebrows were frowned as she looked around in her papers, placing a collection of messy papers and books on her desk. Yet, when everyone seemed confused at the young professor, Trixie only saw her beauty.

Finally, as everyone had gathered, Trixie watched Ms. Zamo stroll over to the board and watched her scribble down her name onto it. ‘Yekaterina Petrovna Zamolodchikova’ was etched clearly on the board, her hand writing more pristine than anything Trixie would have assumed of her. “I promise to hand out brownie-points to anyone who can properly pronounce my name, but Ms. Zamo will work just fine. Some of my students call me Katya, and some of them just call me ‘Ms. Zamalalikov’. You’ll have to make that decision on your own.” Katya’s voice echoed throughout the hall as she turned around to face them, eliciting giggles from her nervous students. Seemingly encouraged by the response she was getting, a wide grin spread on Katya’s face as she continued:

“Now, this is ‘Art History 101’, and I will be your professor. Clearly. If you got confused and thought this was just ordinary history or art class – this would be the time to get up. If not, welcome! I’m here to guide you through the stylistic eras of history, my primary goal is to get you all to understand why we can connect art history to the development of humanity…” Trixie watched as a few bashful students stood up and hurried out of class as Katya spoke, a smirk spreading on her pink lips. Looking over at Katya, she barely seemed to notice the embarrassed freshman’s, but continued to explain the importance of art throughout the ages. Trixie stared so intensely at her professor that she barely noticed when the older woman met her gaze, a twinkle in her blue eyes. The look she got pushed Trixie out of her trance, now focusing more on scribbling down notes as Katya spoke.

Katya’s slight Russian accent lulled Trixie into compliance, taking as many notes as she could whilst she listened. Not before long, the class was over and Katya asked them to come down and fill out their names before they left. Trixie and Kim were the last one’s left, waiting until the hoard of students running down the steps from the benches to Katya’s desk had left. Trixie strolled down, watching her teacher as she looked over the list. She cleared her throat lightly as she walked up to the older woman, a pencil clad with tiny hearts in hand. Katya looked up from where she was sitting behind her desk, a small grin appearing on her red lips as she handed the list over to Trixie. “Ah, I see you pulled out from the crowd; good plan. I think one student might have gotten trampled.”

Trixie had never met a teacher like Katya. She couldn’t be very old, judging by both the way she looked and the way she spoke so youthfully. “I figured it would be worth running to my next class.” Trixie shyly replied as she scribbled down her name on the list. She hadn’t even realized that what she said might be considered flirty until she felt Kim nudge her side. Quickly straightening up, she handed the list to her friend and proceeded to stare down at her arms. “Great class today, Ms. Zamo.” Kim complimented the Russian blonde, earning herself a thank you in return.

“I hope to see you girls next time then, you better hurry so you’re not late for your second class.” Katya nodded at them as Trixie finally dared to look at her, the twinkle in her eyes still present. Kim and Trixie nodded, waving good bye as they sprinted up the stairs. Just as they had headed out and went around the corner, Trixie felt an arm nudge her back. She turned around and was faced by her teacher again, noticing a pencil wiggling around in her manicured hand. “You left this.” Katya explained before handing over the pencil back to Trixie. Before she knew it, she was gone.

“Wow, you know, Ms. Zamo is actually kind of hot.” Kim stated as they watched as the long, black dress disappeared from their view. Trixie didn’t know what to say, other than she was enraptured by the presence of her professor, she had certainly been as peculiar as Kim had made her out to be.

“Yeah, I guess. She’s weird though, isn’t she?” Trixie replied as they walked away. She tried her very best to push away the weird feeling she had in her chest, one she did not want to be caught having, not here, not now. Not for a teacher.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm ba-ba- back agin. How are you guys? I'm really glad you've enjoyed the story thus far. This chapter might a filler for the most part, but we are getting to some juicy stuff. Please let me know what you think, and thank you dearly for the kind words on the story. As always, happy reading my doves!

As the weeks went by, Trixie found herself spending more and more time with Kim and her friends; she enjoyed the company of Pearl, Violet and Sasha even more so than she ever thought she would. Having been a lonely child and teen, Trixie knew she was in no position to turn down social events; nor did she want to. Violet and Pearl were both out in the open and dating, Trixie in turn had never been around other people that were like her – so, she still had to get used to talking about girls and expecting others to listen to her. Trixie hadn’t found someone whom had caught her eye yet, but the prospects of being in a place where she could openly be who she was caused a huge weight to be lifted off her shoulders.

With the prospects of new friends came new opportunities, which entailed going to a lot of different parties and being late for their first class in the morning. However, she had never been late for one of Ms. Zamo’s classes – not until one Monday where she burst through the door, gasping for breath as everyone in class turned around to look at her bemusedly. Katya was generally a very friendly woman, but she hated when people interrupted her lectures, which was why she simply narrowed her brilliant eyes at Trixie and pointed to an available seat.

Trixie, ashamed and still gasping for breath tried to sneak her way into the appointed seat, her eyes averting Katya’s intense glare. She slid into her seat and quietly picked up her notebook, then turning to straighten her white blouse over her beige chinos. It was only when she was completely done that she dared to look up at her professor. “As I was saying, if we look at Van Gogh’s pieces, we can clearly see not only an inner turmoil, but also the influences of modern artistry and a sort of a frontrunner to expressionistic art. Can anyone tell me how expressionism developed as an art form?” Katya asked them, eyes flicking over the class. Trixie’s hand immediately shot into the air, desperate for any form of redemption.

“Yes, Trixie?” Katya acknowledged her, her sharp features challenging the younger woman. Trixie lowered her arm and smiled gently before she answered: “Expressionism developed as an avant-garde style before the first world war, but the term expressionist has been used ever since the 1850’s.” Trixie replied, her smile still present on her face. Katya looked quizzically at her before simply nodding and moving on with her lecture. Trixie turned around and saw Kim a few lines back, a smirk playing on her face. Trixie rolled her eyes and continued taking notes as her professor chatted on about different types of human emotions caught within the realms of art.

Trixie constantly found herself wanting to impress the Russian woman in any way she could, often finding an excuse to ask her something after class. Her friends usually laughed at Katya and her erratic ways, there was little about Katya that resembled any sort of teacher or professor they had ever had which was why she often became the butt of their jokes. Trixie had no desire to join in on their heckling behind Katya’s back, but did so anyway in order to not seem like such a teacher’s pet.

_“I mean honestly, can you even get a degree in just art history? She seems like she just crawled out of some little gallery in New York, when would she have had time to get a degree? Between kindergarten and high school? Something weird is going on, you guys.” Violet rambled, a glass of white wine in her bony hand._

_Trixie shifted in her seat, staring down at her drink. Even though they were sat in a student pub, the thought of Katya or anyone that knew her overhearing them made the blonde incredibly nervous. “Bitch, you’re just pissed that she made you redo the seminar from last week.” Pearl rolled her eyes, clunking down her beer._

_“I like her. She’s a lot better than a lot of the other professors we have, I mean, Mr. Rice’s tests are like weapons of mass destruction for my brain. I can’t figure him out.” Kim replied, shaking her head in disbelief at the exam Santino Rice had forced them to endure earlier that day._

_Sasha was the only one that refused to speak ill of their teachers, and Trixie could have easily joined her and claimed solidarity, but her fear got the better of her. “I mean, Katya is just so frazzled, I can barely even read the notes she gives us.” She chuckled, ignoring the intense stare Sasha gave her._

_Luckily, nobody else seemed to notice the scrutiny she was currently under by her blonde friend since Violet took her comment as an excuse to continue ragging on Katya. “Yeah, totally. I mean, she’s not even a real teacher – I heard she got a job here because she wrote a book on symbolism or some shit like that. I mean, I know that’s like a requirement when you work at a college, but it just seems so pretentious to pick that subject…”_

_Trixie tried to ignore the urge of correcting Violet on what went into getting the type of degree Ms. Zamo had, and just nodded in response as her friend rambled on about their teacher. ‘Maybe I’ll head to the library tomorrow and see if her book is there.’ She thought to herself, ‘Just to see if she’s as frazzled in print as she is in real life.’_

That exact conversation was why Trixie had planned to go see if Ms. Zamo’s book was in the library after class. Call it sheer curiosity, but she needed to know what Katya’s thoughts looked like on print. Before she had a chance to think of an excuse to sneak into the library alone, she was drawn out of her thoughts by the sound of Katya’s voice: “Now, Helena and Patrick, if you got go get that canvas out here to the front of the class.”

Trixie’s eyes followed both students as they trotted a ridiculously large blank canvas out in front of Katya’s white board. The professor thanked them and then picked it up and huffed as she managed to trot it up on the bottom edge of her board, blurring her scribbled notes. Keeping one hand on the large canvas, she grabbed a red white board pen and then looked out to her students. “So, expressionism often communicated a specific emotion – “

“Angst!” Mimi Furst blurted out, interrupting Katya. The blonde nodded, ignored the other giggling students and straightened her tight, black dress before she continued; “Yes, the epitome of all human emotions: Angst. How do you portray angst in an art piece? It might not be something we would think twice about now, but back in the day, one was typically more concerned with people’s perception of your character. So, expressing something as complex as angst took a lot of guts.” Katya explained and then took her red marker in hand, drawing a large ‘X’ in the middle of the canvas.

“This, to me, is angst. Do you agree?” Katya asked directly, looking around at her students. A few people shuffled in their seats, but nobody replied. “If this is brought out a hundred years from now, maybe someone will look at it and see the same things I did. But, to keep you entertained – let’s put this board down on my desk and you can come forward and paint something that represents angst for _you_.”

Katya placed the board on her cluttered desk, and stepped back so the students could start pouring in around it. Trixie followed suit, managing to grab a marker for herself, Kim and Violet as they trotted down behind her. Trixie grabbed a corner of the board after the first wave of students had returned to their seats, and quickly scribbled her idea down before she handed the pen over to Kim. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Katya laughing and clapping her hands when a student accidentally managed to poke a hole into the canvas. “No, no, don’t worry it’s okay!” she comforted the embarrassed freshman whilst still chuckling. Trixie sighed to herself before returning to her seat.

Before the class ended, Katya proudly gathered their board and placed it behind her desk before she called out: “Now, some of you might have already heard about this, but we are introducing a new T-A programme in the arts department – due to popular demand, we are opening it up for freshman students as well. If you want to get an extra merit to put on your resume, it could give you an advantage as you graduate towards more job-directed work… Things. Send me an e-mail if you’re interested and we’ll set up a short interview, it’s not very challenging, just helping me out before classes and stuff.”

Trixie could have sworn Katya looked directly at her, which made the younger girl gulp. She knew that she needed to apply for the T-A job if she ever wanted to get an ‘in’ with any art gallery in town. It was a tough industry, whatever extra merit she could get – she wanted. Even if that meant spending an extra amount of time with her confusing professor.

 

* * *

 

 

Trixie had sent off an e-mail to Katya the following night, and was surprised when she heard back from her the following day, asking if they could meet at four in Katya’s office. Kim spent a full hour trying to calm her down and helping Trixie decide what to wear. “I don’t get why you’re getting so worked up over this, it’s just a T-A job. You’re probably just going to get her stuff to class.”

Trixie whipped her long hair behind her head, sighing as she pulled the blue ‘work’ dress her mother had given her over her curvy body. It went just below her knees, the A-line cut over her breasts giving her an unusually chaste look. She pinned her hair back in a ponytail, still stressing around their room. “It’s not the job in itself, I don’t even know whether it’s worth heading over there.”

Kim sat down on the edge of her bed, glancing down at her feet. “I’m sure you’ll do great. Even if you don’t it’s not the end of the world.”

“I hope so.”

“You’ll be fine, Trix. You show her what that little pussy is made of!” Kim cheered, prompting Trixie to stop dead in her track and stare at her foul-mouthed friend. “Oh, calm down – I didn’t mean literally. Unless you want to, of course.”

Trixie continued to stare at her friend before quickly grabbing her coat and a list of references for Katya. “And on that note, I’m leaving. I’ll text you later.”

 

* * *

 

 

Katya’s office wasn’t that far from her own dorms, so Trixie had little time to prepare herself Having constantly been around her professor for the last two days seemed to drain her. Trixie had no idea on how to act around Katya, for some reason she couldn’t feel at ease with her as much as her classmates had begun to. Trixie felt like she was being watched like a hawk in a class she hadn’t given much thought to before she started. All her other art classes were uncomplicated. Trixie knew she was a good painter, she just needed practice. Once she got to Katya’s institution, she immediately looked around for room 3045. Loud music blared through the office doors, seemingly some sort of Russian grunge. Trixie knocked on the door, her heart thumping in her chest as the music was turned down and Katya yelled for her to come in.

She opened the door, her brown eyes widening at the amount of different types of clutter Katya had around her office. She inched inside, witnessing her professor sat in her chair with her feet propped up onto her desk. She had Chinese food in one hand and clicked around on her computer with her free one.

“Tracy, hi.” She greeted the younger girl and motioned for her to sit down in the red chair on the opposite side of her wooden desk. “It’s Trixie ac— “Trixie started but was interrupted by Katya, “I know, I’m kidding.” She hummed and set the Chinese food down on the floor.

“Oh.” Trixie replied, sitting down in her chair one leg crossed over the other. She glanced around the room, not being able to help the disapproving look on her fair features. “You seem a little bothered by my mess. Don’t fret, I clean at the end of every semester.” Katya joked, setting her feet down on the wooden floor below them.

“I’m sure you do.” Trixie retorted, and handed her list of references over to Katya. “Maybe I should have e-mailed these to you, I think the room might swallow it.”

She knew some professors might think she was being rude, but Katya just cackled and took her list. It felt like sitting down with one of her friends. A friend that happened to be strikingly beautiful and made her incredibly uncomfortable at most times, that is. “Wouldn’t be the first time, I’ve lost two wallets and a phone in here.”

“Now I’m definitely reconsidering the e-mail.”

Katya scanned over Trixie’s reference list quickly, her eyes widening as she got to the end of the page. “You have a mayor as a reference?” Katya asked in disbelief, looking up at Trixie over the paper. Trixie’s cheeks flushed, she knew putting her dad up as a reference was too much. “Uh, yeah; t-that’s not supposed to be on there. It’s my dad.” She replied shakily, not sure where the typically confident Trixie had gone.

Katya hummed, the corners of her lips drawing down into a surprised look as she set the paper down on her desk. “That’s alright, I would use that too if it were my dad. Now, Trixie, let’s get to the questions. “Trixie shifted in her seat as Katya spoke, crossing her arms over her chest protectively.

“What interests you in art?”

Trixie wanted to say; everything, but knew that was too vague of an answer. “I think the ability to express myself in any way I’d like, without boundaries or demands from anyone around me. If I’m painting I feel untouchable, like no one can affect me.” Katya listened intensely as she spoke, which made Trixie even more nervous. The scrutinizing stare of her professor seemed to always catch her off guard, especially when she glanced up and stared directly into those brilliant orbs.

“Very good. Now, the job would entail going with me to find materials for class, extra assignments to ensure your continued capability and helping me grade papers; does that sound like something you can do?” Katya continued, putting Trixie on the spot. “Yeah, that sounds great!” Trixie gleefully replied, although her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes.

“Are you sure? I work best in the evenings, so there might be some late nights.” Katya warned, leaning back in her chair. Trixie nodded again, keeping her nearly manic grin on her face. “I would really appreciate the opportunity; I work hard and I drink a lot of coffee so I’m all set for late evenings.” Trixie continued, mimicking Katya’s actions.

“Okay, well then you can’t really judge me all that much for my Red Bull addiction. This might just work out perfectly, Trix.” Katya winked, prompting the young blonde to flush again. All of a sudden the prospects of grading papers with Katya all night wasn’t the most unthinkable of scenarios in Trixie’s head.

Suddenly, after Katya had stared at Trixie’s flushed cheeks, she stood up from her seat and coughed as she grabbed her purse. “Well, I think that’s all for right now. I’ll let you know later this week if you get the job or not, it pays either minimal wage or offers gift certificates for course literature.”

Trixie stood up as well, extending a hand for Katya to shake. “I look forward to hearing from you, Ms. Zamo.” Katya looked at her hand before she placed her own in Trixie’s. Katya shook her hand briskly, the warmth of her palm prompting a shiver to run up Trixie’s back. Katya smelt good, like a floral combination of roses and something undetectable. “Thank you Trixie, I’m sure we can be of some service to each other.”

There was something in the tone Katya used that made Trixie want to keep touching her hand, but that moment passed her by as the bony, pale hand of Katya’s let go of her own tanned one. They stood in front of each other by the door of Katya’s office, just making small talk before Trixie had to get going. If there was anything she could take with her from the experience she had just had, it was that something had happened. It was probably just in her imagination, but Katya’s penetrative stare seemed to indicate something entirely different behind her objective interest. Trixie was dying to find out what that was.

A few days later, as promised, an envelope made its way to Trixie and Kim’s room. Violet and Pearl, whom had been over for dinner, laughed along with Kim as Trixie tore open the letter and skipped around from joy after she had read it. She, along with another girl Trixie hadn’t met yet, were going to be helping Katya. She had made it, the only thing that could distract her from her euphoria was the slight pang of jealousy she felt when she had read that another girl would be helping Katya. Maybe Trixie wasn’t enough?  


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys, I can't thank you enough for the kind comments on Geronimo. This will be sort of a slow burn, since there's a lot of barriers for Trixie and Katya to push through, but I hope you'll come along for the ride. Not to put a damper on this, but if anyone has any information on the summaries that were read to Trixya at Drag con, please send me a message - I would like to know if any of my works were outed there. Let's just hope we can avoid that debacle in the future. On a much happier note, I hope you enjoy and as always, happy readings my doves!

” You know if we’re going to be sharing responsibilities I would actually like you to…” Trixie seethed, staring at the red head in front of her before she was rudely interrupted again: “Hey Trixie, do you think we could get tomorrow off? Me and my friends are going to see the Chainsmokers – I cannot miss it because Ms. Zamo needs us to pick up some more prints.” Farrah replied, glancing over her phone at Trixie. She was a sweet girl, but Trixie damned Katya internally for choosing to partner her with Farrah Moan. As Trixie stared at her in disbelief, Farrah pouted and set her phone down on Katya’s desk, which they had been allowed to borrow whilst Katya tried to find them desks of their own to keep in the small office beside her own. “You know, I could do with a little less talking from you and a little more listening, because if we’re talking we’re not – what?” Trixie snapped, patting her ear with her index finger to signal what Farrah’s response should be.

“Oh, come on – I’ve worked really hard and it’s not just fair if I have to miss it.” Farrah whined, her pout growing by the second. If it wasn’t for her adorable looks, Trixie would have punched her a long time ago – unfortunately, watching those puppy dog eyes made some of her resent wash away. Trixie sighed and set her arms down in her lap. “Fine, you go; I’ll talk to Katya and see if I can’t grade for the both of us. But you owe me big time, bitch.”

Farrah squealed with delight and leaned over to hug Trixie from where she was sitting. “Oh, thank you Trixie. I promise I’ll make it up to you!”

“Yeah, you better.”

 

* * *

 

 

Later that evening, Trixie sat on her bed and fired away a message to her irritating colleague on Facebook. Farrah might be irresponsible, but Trixie hoped that she had at the very least told Katya about their plan. Trixie glanced over at her side as she waited, watching Kim as she painted her nails in a deep, green shade. “Are you still up for watching that show we were talking about earlier?” she asked her friend, hoping she could at least have some down time this week.

Kim looked over at her and beamed, “Yeah, of course. Get over here and let me do your nails for you, it’s like you’ve stopped caring all together.”

Trixie rolled her eyes and told her friend to wait a minute as she heard a familiar ‘ping’ from her computer. She clicked into Facebook and found a new message from Farrah:

**Farrah Moan:** _Yeah, she told me that she felt sorry for you. It’s a huge stack._

Trixie sighed, drumming her fingers against the lap top as Farrah continued to write.

**Farrah Moan:** _I so owe you for this, Trix. I think Katya likes you more than me though, so you’ll be totally fine._

**Trixie Mattel:** _Yeah no shit, Sherlock. I actually show up for work._

**Farrah Moan:** _I do show up, they told us that we could manage the job with our studies so that’s what I’m doing, bitch_

Deciding to leave well enough alone, Trixie shut down her lap top without answering Farrah and headed over to Kim’s bed. She plummeted down on it, resting her back horizontally across her friend’s bed with her arms over her head. “Ah, I can’t do this with her anymore! Why would she even apply for the job if she’s not actually going to do it?” she exclaimed, growling under her breath.

She felt Kim grab a hold of one of her arms and tugging it towards her so she could begin painting her nails. “Look at it this way, you’ll be the one in Katya’s good graces. I don’t think a T-A that’s never there is going to get any perks.” Kim soothed as she slugged the green paint onto Trixie’s long finger nails. Trixie peeked at Kim with one eye, debating with herself whether it was necessarily important for her to get in Katya’s good graces. She did feel a small sense of pride whenever she helped her professor out, the look of gratitude in Katya’s blue eyes was enough to make Trixie’s cheeks flush.

“I don’t think Katya cares all that much to be honest.” She muttered, glancing down at the atrocity that was taking form on her nails. Kim huffed and set her arm down, reaching for the other. Trixie sat up and reluctantly gave her friend her other hand and continued to muse to herself; “I don’t really think of her as a teacher when we’re just grading or picking up stuff, she’s really down to earth.”

“Yeah, and hot as hell too. You can tell that she likes you.” Kim replied innocently, prompting her blonde comrade to huff and tug her arm away. Kim chuckled and dragged her arm back, smudging some of the nail polish onto Trixie’s fingers. “Don’t act like you don’t check her out from time to time.”

Trixie wasn’t used to any of her friends asking about her and what kind of women she was interested in, so she found it difficult to open up about her feelings; she knew she had nothing to feel embarrassed about, but it still crept up on her. “You’re crazy, she’s a teacher.” She huffed, hoping Kim would leave her alone about the matter.

“Whatever you say, but I see you. I can’t be fooled, bitch.”

“Oh, sorry, I forgot that part – you’re the only lisping fool that can’t be fooled.” Trixie snorted, earning herself a slap on the hand by Kim. Both girls erupted into giggles, the late night getting to them. “If you can’t take me at my lisp, you don’t deserve me at my enunciation.” Kim retorted, which made them both laugh even harder.

Trixie gasped for air as she watched Kim ruin her nails even further, “You are literally doing the shittiest job I have ever seen – I’m going to take this off right now.”

 

* * *

 

 

The following evening had Trixie in jumbles. She was supposed to head over to Katya’s office, but got stuck trying to figure out what to wear, yet again. Finally, she threw a pink shirt on with a pair of blue jeans, her long hair meticulously curled. Her make up was as extravagant as usual, the sharp lines accentuating her face. If she was going to stand being around Katya all night, she could at least look good. It was all for her own benefit, especially so she could cover up the remnants from Kim’s sturdy nail polish that refused to come off no matter how much Trixie scrubbed at them with polish remover.

She glanced over at Kim and Pearl, who were perched on Kim’s bed watching a show. “I’m out, hookers – I don’t think I’ll be in until late, so enjoy your evening.” Neither girl looked up, but just hummed at her until she grabbed her purse and left. She was lucky to have found such great friends, even if they tormented her about her fashion choices and refused to do anything but watch sad Korean soaps operas on Kim’s computer.

Her pink heels clicked as she strutted down the streets of campus, a haste in her step as she was nearly late for her appointment. She figured that Katya owed her, the older woman was rarely ready to start when Trixie got there. Being around her so much the last couple of weeks had helped Trixie relax more in her company, but there was always some form of tension in the midst of their laughter and bonding – something Trixie couldn’t quite put her finger on.

She knocked on Katya’s door as she had done so many times before, inviting herself in before the professor could even call her in. This time however, Trixie wished she had waited. Katya was bent over, picking something up from the ground; which would seem mundane enough if it hadn’t been for the way her black jeans clung around her legs and ass, her red blouse flowy and slightly transparent. Trixie gulped and looked away, not noticing when Katya stood up again. “Oh, hey Trixie. I heard Farrah ditched you again.” Katya greeted her, trying to find her eyes. Trixie finally looked back at her and smiled slightly, “Yeah, I like to collect favours.”

Katya chuckled and swirled around to her chair, plumping herself down onto it and gesturing for Trixie to sit down as well. Trixie did as she was told, noticing a thermos of what smelt like coffee and a couple of sandwiches. She watched intently as Katya poured herself and Trixie a cup each before she pushed one over to the younger blonde. “I figured we could skip that terrible coffee machine sludge, I brought my own stash.” Katya beamed at her, nodding along as Trixie took a tentative sip from her cup. The coffee was incredibly strong for someone like Trixie, whom usually got her fix by a Starbucks Frappuccino. She felt her eyes water and her features distorted into a comedic grimace. Katya wheezed as she watched Trixie try and get the beverage down without yacking, “It’s a little strong, perhaps.” Katya added, still laughing.

Trixie, now incredibly embarrassed, set her cup down on the desk and shivered out of disgust. “No, it’s – it’s totally fine.” She coughed, wiping away the tears from her eyes. She pushed the cup away from her, instead bending down to pick up the water bottle she had brought with her from her room. “Farrah said we had a lot of grading to do.” She inquired whilst taking a much-needed sip from her water. She glanced across the desk at Katya, whom was in the process of tying her curly hair up in a bun. ‘ _She looks gorgeous_ ’, Trixie thought to herself but quickly pushed those feelings down as she studied her professor. Her red lipstick was put on with what seemed like great care, which was odd since Katya rarely cared about what she looked like.  

“We have to grade some papers from Art History two and three, as well as the exams in symbolism I had last week.” Katya informed her, pointing to the ridiculously large bunt of papers beside her. “I think we’ll start with the exams. They might be the most tedious.” Her professor continued, grabbing a stack of papers and handing them over to Trixie.

Trixie squinted her eyes at the exams, noticing that the questions seemed to correlate with the main hypothesis Katya brought up in her own book. She opened her first exam, checking the answers with the ones Katya had scribbled down on a piece of paper to her. They both sat down, grading silently. All that could be heard was the rapid scribblings of Katya as she graded the exams at an impressive speed. “Did you use your own book as course literature for this?” Trixie asked, feeling obliged to say something.

Katya glanced up at her and smiled knowingly as she set down her pen: “Sure is, Ms. Mattel. Have you been checking out my work?” she inquired, her words making the blush on Trixie’s cheeks intensify.

“No, of course not. I just saw the Da Vinci code and thought it was interesting, so I took a glance at your book.” Trixie lied, trying to keep a straight face as Katya huffed and pointed a bony finger at Trixie. “Do not mistake me for some Dan Brown-sell out. You won’t believe how many students I get that tell me ‘ _Oh, I thought Tom Hanks finding the Holy Grail was so compelling, like he just used symbols_ ’ – that’s so not what I do.” Katya ranted, her voice squeaky as she imitated her students. Trixie huffed with laughter, careful not to point out the fact that she had thought Katya would be some type of Robert Langdon impersonator herself.

“It could be worse; you could be stuck with Tom Cruise or something. Out of all the Tom’s, I feel like Hanks is the one to go with.” She pointed out, smirking as Katya’s arched brow cocked. “Well, if you both read my book and watched Tom Hanks butcher my profession; then you probably won’t need these either.” Katya then snatched the page with all the keys to the exam, snickering as she stowed it away.

Trixie snorted, eyes pleading as she watched Katya’s broadening grin. She knew that their banter was probably considered inappropriate, but joking around with Katya made Trixie feel so content. That tension was still there, even as she extended her hand and tried to make puppy eyes between fits of giggles. In an ideal world, Katya would have worked with children – they would have loved her. Trixie got the feeling that the Russian intentionally made her students feel more welcomed and comfortable in her presence by being as wonderfully weird as she often was, as a strategy of sorts. It helped them out a lot, but Trixie wondered where she should draw the line for herself – she did not want to take things too far and then wind up in trouble. That proved to be an impossibility, as Katya handed her paper back and then winced as she rubbed her neck.

Trixie returned to her grading, but noticed how Katya fidgeted in her seat for the next hour or so. It was apparent that she was in pain, probably a natural occurrence when you spent an entire evening trying to get caught up on work. Finally, when Katya had fidgeted yet again, Trixie had to ask her: “You look like you’re in pain.”

“You have a sharp eye, Trixie.” Katya sarcastically remarked, her Russian accent rolling the ‘r’ in her name in an irresistible way. Trixie mentally slapped herself for making such a painfully obvious remark, but she had to get an opening in. It seemed rude to not comment on it, she decided for herself. Without thinking about what she said next, the words just flew out of her mouth, “I could help you with that.”

Katya looked up at her, an unreadable expression on her sharp features. She seemed hesitant, understandably so given what Trixie had just proposed. Trixie watched as Katya seemed to be mentally debating with herself before she replied: “What did you have in mind?” Trixie knew this was wrong, or if not wrong, then inappropriate. She had just offered to physically touch her professor – there must be some kind of law against that. Despite of all this, she stood up from her seat and headed over to stand behind Katya, hands grasping her thin neck. “I’m sorry if this I weird, but my mom is really good at back rubs – she taught me a thing or two.” Trixie mumbled, waiting to start kneading on Katya’s back. She assumed that the professor would tell her that it was okay and that she could get back to her seat; but she didn’t. Instead, Katya just coughed awkwardly and nodded.

As Trixie worked on Katya’s back, she could feel her heart thumping in her chest. She should feel like this was wrong, but that feeling just kept crawling further away from her as she felt Katya relax in her touch. Trixie had no idea where the line was drawn between a student and a professor, they were both adults – the only exception being that Katya could flunk her tests and could buy wine without having to fish out a fake ID. Trixie was just six months away from being able to do so herself, but that difference seemed crucial now. She needed to remember that, even when Katya let out a content sigh. Trixie pressed down a bit harder on Katya’s neck, knowing that she needed to work out the knots before they were done. “Is that okay?” she asked, kneading slightly harder with every push of her palm.

“Yeah.” Katya breathed, her hands grasping her desk. Trixie felt warmer, sweat threatening to break on her back. “M-maybe you should consider a career in physical therapy if this doesn’t work out.” She continued, her voice indicating that she was trying to make a joke but fell short of doing so. Trixie chortled awkwardly, placing the final presses on Katya’s back. Part of her knew that she needed to stop before Katya noticed that she was deliberately lengthening the massage, but then there was the devil on her shoulder that told her to keep going, that she liked touching Katya and making her feel good.

She nearly felt dizzy as she slipped her hands away from Katya’s neck, straightening the older woman’s blouse as she retreated from her grasp. Trixie quietly slipped away from where she was standing and sat down in her seat again. When she looked up at Katya, she noticed that her cheeks nearly matched the colour of her crimson top. A deafening silence spread between the two women, each of them trying their best to stay focused on their work.

“Look Trixie, I don’t want you to feel like you had to do that. I don’t want this to be…” Katya began, pulling Trixie from her trance. She looked up at the blonde, not entirely sure what answer Katya was looking for. Trixie had been the one to make things awkward, not her – so she didn’t know why those blue eyes darted around the room, from Trixie’s face to the window on their left. “No, it’s fine. I just thought you looked a little tense, ‘is all. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” Trixie shrugged, trying her best to seem nonchalant.

Katya did not reply immediately, instead, she continued to gaze out of the window. Seemingly deep in thought, Trixie had to cough slightly to get her attention. Katya’s eyes dashed back to her, a small smile on her red lips. “No, you didn’t make me uncomfortable. Listen, I think we’ve been cooped up in here for far too long – why don’t you go home and get some sleep?”

Trixie knew Katya was trying to flee from their stiff exchange, which Trixie was all for. She felt like she had fucked up in some way, a deep-set knot beginning to take form in her stomach as she stood up and grabbed her purse. “I’ll try to make sure Farrah is here for our next appointment.” She announced to Katya as her professor stood up. Katya shuffled her feet, looking down onto the ground.

“Actually, I booked a meeting with Farrah; she has skipped so many appointments now that I might not be able to keep her on. The university won’t pay for T-A students that don’t fulfil their obligations.” Katya informed her, causing the knot in Trixie’s stomach to tighten even more. She hoped that Farrah realized she had nothing to do with it, but thoughts of her colleague wasn’t nearly enough to make Trixie so anxious – it was spending that much time alone with Katya. Judging by her own behaviour, Trixie was unable to trust herself around her professor.

She stepped towards the door, Katya following her. Trixie felt a shiver go up her spine when a slim hand grazed her lower back, gently guiding her out of the room. She turned around and stood to attention, apparently, she looked ridiculous enough for Katya to snort at her – a smirk playing on her lips. “At ease, soldier. I’ll e-mail you about our next meeting.”

Trixie crossed her arms over her chest and nodded. “Sure. Um, have a nice evening Ms. Zamo.” She fumblingly replied. Katya reached behind her head to scratch her newly massaged neck. “You too, Trixie. I’ll see you soon.”

Just like that, the door was closed. Trixie could hear Katya sigh from behind it, and she felt a sudden urge to stroke the wooden door with her hand, but refrained from doing so. She needed to get home, go to sleep, and forget the feeling of Katya’s skin underneath her hands.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I am so overwhelmed by the immense support and love I have gotten for this fic, you guys are amazing. This note will be quite short as I am in a bit of a rush, so I'll just get to it - happy readings my doves!

Heading to the movies with your friends seemed like an innocent pleasure. Unless you were Trixie Mattel of course, then even the most ordinary event could turn into a complete nightmare.

 

* * *

 

 

Trixie was no stranger to sulking, in fact, it summarized most of her time at home. However, since she had gone to college, her need to mope around had lessened. Being around her friends certainly helped a lot. She had managed to find a true friend in Violet, whom she had been hesitant of getting to know at first. The bitchy brunette seemed like the type of girl that wouldn’t even go near Trixie in high school, claiming that they were afraid to ‘catch it’. Naturally suspicious since that period in her life, Trixie had little hopes of ever becoming more than an acquaintance of Violet’s; which was why she was inevitably shocked when said brunette made a real effort to get to know her.

**Violet:** _Hey bimbette, just talked to Kim and Sasha, movies tonight??_

**Trixie:** _Hey, are we talking like the movies, movies? Nothing in 3D please, hurts my eyes._

**Violet:** _You are such a shit stain, fine – we’ll just have to see Beauty and the Beast without the cool effects._

**Trixie:** _Thanks, babe. See you later._

Getting a night off was just what she needed. Lately, all she seemed to be doing was either her own school work or grading the works of someone else. After their awkward encounter in Katya’s office, she had sent home some papers for Trixie to grade. A part of her was hurt that her professor must think Trixie is _that_ kind of girl. She wasn’t, was she?

Touching Katya has been an out of body experience. No matter how much Trixie tried to suppress it, the thought of Katya’s smooth skin lingered under the palms of her hands. She didn’t know what it was, probably just confusion from being able to talk so freely to her teacher that she forgot where to draw the line between professionalism and friendship. Everything about the Russian woman confused her, Trixie felt as if every feeling she had contradicted itself, and the only thing she was left with was a knot in her stomach telling her she needed to walk out of that office and never return.

Essentially, she needed a night out where she didn’t have to pretend to be better or more controlled, but just her. In the spirit of being comfortable, Trixie put on a pair of sleek work out tights, the dark fabric clinging to her thick thighs. She slipped on an absurdly large hoodie over it, matching with white sneakers. Normally, she was always very prim and proper, but she figured being in a dark movie theatre gave her an excuse to wear her pink hoodie and just put a comb through her blonde hair. After having put on a light layer of make-up, she looked over at Kim whom was dressed in her onesie, still gawking at Trixie.   


“What?” Trixie snorted as her friend burst into giggles.

“I’ve raided through your closet so many times, and I have still never seen that atrocity of a sweatshirt.” Trixie rolled her eyes at Kim, shaking her head as she straightened her clothes. “Oh honey, the one with the unicorn onesie on should _not_ be talking about atrocities.” Trixie countered, snapping her perfectly manicured fingers at Kim.

“We’re going to be late Kylie Jenner, let’s go!” Kim called for her as she walked out the door, leaving the blonde to hastily scrap up her phone and wallet before doing the same.

 

* * *

 

 

“Remind me why we’re seeing Beauty and the Beast again?” Sasha moaned as they headed into the cinema. Violet locked arms with her and comfortingly squeezed it before replying: “Because we need some love in our lives, like, I could meet a handsome prince in there – “she glanced around at everyone else’s comfortable ensembles then looked down on her own fashionable jumpsuit before continuing, “then again, it probably wouldn’t matter since I apparently asked the stoner kids to hang out.”

Trixie snorted, not believing how much backlash she was receiving for her hoodie. “This is literally the reason why I never wear something like this, you are all a bunch of nasty hoes.” She barked, dramatically scrunching her nose with her head turned up to the ceiling. “Hey, I never said anything – this is all on them!” Sasha defended herself whilst pointing towards Violet, Kim and Pearl. Sasha was wearing some punk-y response to comfortable living, her ‘Rancid’ t-shirt consisting of more holes than actual fabric.

Whilst they stood in line for snacks, Trixie cursed her friends for making her pay. “How come you think it’s easier if ‘ _one person pays for everything’_? I’m never getting my money back.” She complained as her friends picked out their treats. They all babbled in unison that they would pay her back, but this way they could all share and split the bill between them, which did make more sense to Trixie when she hauled out her father’s credit card. Her more softened approach came to a halt when the cashier pushed the snacks over to her, and she realized her friends had left the line. Trixie cursed and grabbed the sodas, the multiple bags of candy and then dumped them in the large box of popcorn Pearl had forced her to buy.

“Hey, get over here!” Trixie exclaimed as she grabbed the box and trotted over from the line. The girls crowded around her and grabbed their different treats, babbling as they did so.

Trixie, who was left with a bag of Hershey’s kisses and a diet coke glanced over to the other end of the small movie theatre as she heard a familiar giggle coming from it.

“Hey, look! It’s Ms. Zamo.” Pearl announced, her monotonous voice not doing the situation justice. It wasn’t just the fact that Katya stood there, dressed in another one of her problem patterned dresses nor that she had straightened her blonde hair and tied a top-knot into it – it was her company that made Trixie gawk. She was with a man, a very handsome man at that; and that handsome man had his arm flung around Katya’s shoulders as they laughed together.

They seemed to be having fun, the jealous flare in Trixie’s chest noted. She should be happy for Katya, there were all these rumours going around that all she had was her Wiccan group, Trixie ought to be glad that fate hadn’t been bestowed onto anyone. But she didn’t feel happy, just anxious. Anxious because _he_ stood there in a tailored suit whilst she had on tights and a hoodie.

Just as Katya turned towards them, Trixie looked away. She knew she was being childish, but this was her night off. She didn’t need Katya to be constantly looming over her head, enough was enough. She had hoped for a silent form of solidarity from her friends, but her hopes were squandered as Kim called out: “Hey, Ms. Zamo!”

Trixie stared down at her feet until she felt a breeze of that perfume she had grown accustomed to. Realizing that saying nothing was by far the worst option she had, Trixie plastered a smile on her face and looked up. Katya looked amused, asking Kim about her onesie. Trixie unconsciously fiddled with the hem of her shirt and hoped to any divine force that there wasn’t a stain on it. She watched Katya watch Kim, not realizing her intense stare at her professor’s face. Finally, when Katya met her gaze, a familiar warmth seemed to spread throughout the older woman. “Ah, my T-A! Justin, this is Trixie – she’s my assistant, of sorts.” Katya beamed as she looked up at the man that still had his arm around her.

Trixie became very aware of the fact that they stood right in the middle of a movie theatre, people constantly pushed past them without knowing that something monumental was happening. The dark-haired man raised a thin brow at her, a smile playing on the corners of his full lips. He extended a hand for Trixie to shake, which she took meekly. “Don’t let this one boss you around too much, sweetheart.” Justin drawled at her, his overly dragged out tone suggesting to Trixie that he was either having a stroke or trying to make fun of her. She hoped it was the former. She smiled in return, the mumble of her voice disappointing her: “I’m not her assistant.”

Justin let go of her hand and appeared to be valuing her, his cold stare going from her feet to the top of her blonde head. Trixie glanced over at Kim, whom was smiling nervously. “No, I’m the one the brings the coffee; Trixie is a tremendous help for me.” Katya continued, forcing Trixie to focus on her yet again. “Trixie is very smart, she figured out that Janet and Brad were actually figments of Frank N. Furter’s imagination. “Kim blurted out, prompting everyone to stare at her. Trixie’s cheeks flushed as she stared at Kim, whilst Violet and Pearl simply rolled their eyes. Sasha had something undetectable in her gaze, like she was working out some form of a puzzle.

The way they all stood in a circle made the awkward silence that probably only lasted a few seconds feel like forever. Katya raised her brows, and then let her beautiful face turn to Trixie one final time. “We will discuss this in our next meeting, because that analysis might be the most absurd thing I’ve heard all week – but on that note, we have to get our snacks before the movie starts. You girls have fun!” she and Justin waved goodbye as they headed towards the counter again. They appeared to be having some form of discussion as they walked away, their heads close together as they whispered.

Trixie slapped Kim’s arm, eliciting a huff from her friend. They headed into the viewing room, finding their seats in silence. Trixie stared down at her phone, trying to pretend like there was something on there that was extremely riveting. “Trixie, are you okay?” she heard Sasha’s voice in her ear as she placed a gentle hand on Trixie’s shoulder.

‘ _Abort mission, abort mission’_

“Oh yeah, I’m fine – why are you asking?” Trixie turned her head to smile almost manically at Sasha as the lighting around them dimmed. Sasha retracted her hand from her, still studying Trixie’s face like she was some type of alien. “Okay, just let me know if there’s something you want to talk about.” Sasha stated, the seriousness in her gaze held no judgement, yet it made Trixie feel like a child that had been caught in the act.

She nodded in response and focused on opening her bag of candy as she noticed Katya and Justin heading down towards their seats, a few rows down from the girls. Katya seemed happy, she laughed and offered her date some popcorn from her box. Trixie stared at them more than she looked at Emma Watson and her unfortunate love affair.

 

* * *

 

 

“She is young, Katya.” Justin warned her as they walked away from the girls. Katya did not dare to look back at her, she didn’t want to send the wrong signals. Then again, she already had. Everything about them was beginning to get twisted, and Katya was a horrible person.

“I know, I know. There’s nothing to worry about, I’ve got everything under control.” She replied, making sure to keep her blue eyes fixed on the counter ahead of them. The situation she had put herself in was by far one of the worst decisions she had ever made in her life, and God only knows that she has made so many mistakes.

“Are you sure? That girl looked like she had seen the sun when she saw you.” Justin continued, hopefully unknowing that his comment about Trixie made Katya’s heart swell with pride. In hopes of disguising whatever dignity she had left, Katya hauled out her credit card to pay for their snacks and simply muttered: “She’s not a girl.”

 

* * *

 

 

A few days passed before she needed to return to Katya. She was just dropping off the papers she had graded, nothing more. ‘ _I can do this, this isn’t a big deal – you’re fine, Trixie.’_

After having been forced to endure Katya seeing her in her sweats, Trixie put in an extra effort when she got dressed that morning. She had on a yellow dress that clung to her waist, the 70’s cut of it making her feel more mature as she strapped on her brown boots. Who cares that she had to wear it to all her other classes that day, it just meant that she would look more worn in when she got to Katya’s, and not like she had just changed to go over there.

The day proceeded to go by alarmingly fast, her nerves acting up more and more as the clock ticked closer to three. When it was finally time to go, she told her friends that she would meet them for dinner before making her way over to Katya’s office. Her cluttered office had almost become symbolic to Trixie, like the centre of her life had changed from being in her room with her friends to the wooden walls that in no way matched Katya’s eccentric personality.

Trixie knocked on the door, shuffling her feet as she heard light footsteps coming towards her from the other side. The door opened, revealing a dishevelled Katya. Her white blouse had a coffee stain on it, making one of the embroidered flowers on it look dull and brown. Her blue bell bottoms were equally covered in the brown liquid, and her hair was once again curly and placed in a banana clip. Trixie cocked a brow and looked at the loose strand of hair in Katya’s face. She wondered what would happen if she were to reach out and tuck it behind her ear.

“Come in, come in.” Katya mumbled as she headed back inside, bending behind her desk to continue cleaning up the mess she had made. Trixie tentatively walked in, placing the stack of papers on Katya’s desk as she watched her professor on the floor. “Are you alright?” Trixie asked, she could nearly see how Katya’s nerves shone through her thin body.

“Yes, I’m fine – I just got a phone call that surprised me, ‘is all. Thank you for grading those papers, Trix.” Katya replied nervously as she continued to wipe down the floor. Trixie walked over to the other side of the desk, her eyes widening as she realized Katya must have spilled an entire thermos onto the floor. She looked up at the box of paper towels that were placed onto the desk, debating with herself on what she should do next. Finally, she moved Katya’s chair even further back, and grabbed some paper towels before she bent down opposite from her professor to help clean up. “No, Trixie – you’re sweet but I can…” Katya looked up from where she was sitting and found Trixie’s face. Her cheeks were flushed, and her yellow dress had ridden up over her thighs as she sat down on her legs. Trixie tried to pretend like she didn’t notice Katya’s gaze on her body.

“It’s okay, I can help.” She said softly, and then looked down to start wiping up the remnants of the coffee.

“Thank you.” Katya muttered as she continued to violently wipe up the liquid.

“So, was it a good phone call? I’m sorry if I ask too much, you don’t have to tell me.” Trixie asked, hoping she hadn’t been too intrusive. Katya sighed from where she was sitting, and discarded a few more paper towels onto the clean floor beside her. “No, it’s fine. I’ve been invited to speak at a seminar in Paris next month. It is like this prestigious thing for art historians, in reality, it’s just a bunch of white, old men that think they know everything there is to know about art.”

Trixie beamed as she stopped wiping and focused on her professor instead. “Katya, that’s great! Didn’t I say you were just like Robert Langdon?” her response made Katya snort at her, only replying by tossing one of the stained towels onto Trixie’s thigh. She giggled as she took the towel in her hand and threw it back onto the floor. “I bet your boyfriend is happy for you.” Trixie added innocently, peeking from under her brow at Katya. The older woman stopped dead in her tracks, and instead watched Trixie with an amused expression in her face.

“Boyfriend?” she asked, the hope she had previously killed within Trixie was slowly flaring up again.

“Yeah, Justin – the guy that was with you when we met the other night?” Trixie continued, becoming unsure of herself as Katya burst in laughter, her wheezing accompanied by the flailing of her arms. Trixie watched her as she laughed, silently worried if Katya got any breaths in whilst she laughed uncontrollably. “I didn’t know it was a ‘ha-ha’ thing.” She snorted, internally pleased when Katya finally stopped laughing at her.

“I’m sorry, I guess it’s not funny if you don’t know him. He is probably the gayest man I’ve ever met, Trixie.” Katya replied, out of breath from her near fit. Trixie rolled her eyes and tried to look indifferent, even though the knot in her stomach did flips and turns as she realized Katya wasn’t involved with that man.

“Oh, well, you two looked good together – so, I guess I just assumed.”

“Thank you.” Katya replied, a smile playing on her red lips. Trixie suddenly felt awkward as the Russian woman smirked at her, like she knew more than she was supposed to. Finally, Trixie coughed lightly and stood up, suddenly feeling light headed.

“I guess I’ll just get going.” She announced before grabbing her bag and heading over to the door. Katya nodded and followed her until she stood in front of Trixie. Her eyes darted over the room, she needed to look anywhere besides Katya’s face. She felt a hand tug on the lower hem of her dress, the feeling of Katya’s fingers roaming the fabric made a fire explode in Trixie’s stomach. Her eyes darted down to the hand, noticing a big stain on it. “Looks like I managed to ruin your clothes too, Trixie.” Katya began, rolling the ‘r’s in a way that made Trixie gulp. “You send me the bill for the dry cleaning, okay?”

“I-it’s fine.” Trixie replied, disappointed when Katya let go of her dress. “I should go.”

And just like that, she was gone again. Only now, she had realized what was wrong with her; love, in its most adulterated form.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I was not planning to post this for a while, but I just couldn't help myself; although the next chapter might take a while, so I guess I'm making up for lost time in advance. You guys are seriously so sweet, it makes me unable to hold off on posting, haha. I wanted to incorporate a chapter from Katya's POV - mostly so we can get a deeper understanding of her. There is some Russian in this chapter that I have most likely butchered, which is embarrassing since I am part Russian myself, but oh well. We are inching towards the good stuff, so hang in there! As always, please kudos and comment (which you are already so nice about, so) - happy readings my doves!

” So, are you going to let me in on what’s going on with you?” Justin drawled, glancing at Katya from across her small dinner table. The curly blonde took a second to swallow her soup before she glanced over at her friend. “What do you mean?” she inquired innocently whilst picking up her glass of red wine.

“You’ve been distant all week, the only thing I can get you to talk about is that Tracy girl.” Her friend complained, dragging a bony hand through his dark brown curls. Katya thought she had been less obvious than that, but any type of situation she found herself in reminded her of the young woman she had gotten to know over the past few weeks. Trixie was amazingly funny, smart and she appreciated irony; it was hard for Katya not to admire her. “Well, her name is Trixie and I do not talk about her all the time.” She waved him off, scrunching her eyebrows together as she focused on the meal she had prepared for them. Her mother’s borscht recipe followed Katya wherever she went, it was possibly the only thing she still liked about her mom.

“Yes you do, if I didn’t know any better I would have guessed you were going for the ‘Barely Legally Blonde’-type.” Justin chuckled at his own joke, the wine getting the better of him. Katya rolled her eyes, but remained silent as she kept sipping on her soup. She had hoped that Justin would drop the subject when she didn’t humour him, but she quickly realized that her not saying anything told him everything he needed to know. Katya glanced up at her friend and noticed that his big eyes were bulging even further out of his skull than usual. “Are you serious? Katya!” He scolded her.

He wasn’t wrong. She knew that there was something about the way she felt for Trixie that was far from right. It seems like her family was right, Katya would never amount to anything other than being a complete train wreck. If it wasn’t for the fact that she was a bisexual, then it was something about how she chose a career over dating; they would always find something to complain about.

“I know, it’s fucked up.” Katya murmured whilst dragging her spoon around in her half-eaten bowl of Borscht. There was no point in denying it, Justin would see right through her façade. Katya had a crush on a twenty-year-old girl. There was no sugar coating what she was doing.

“You know you can’t…” Justin began, but Katya interrupted him by raising one hand into the air, the expression of her face signalling how tired she was. “Do anything about it? Of course not, I would lose my job.”

“Would you though? I mean, it’s not like she’s in high school – even though she is obviously too young for you.” She knew that Justin tried to find a way to make her feel better, like he always did. They had a large group of friends, and he was by far the most understanding of them all. They hadn’t always been close, but ever since their friend Ginger had forced them on a ski trip to Aspen; they had stuck together like glue.

Katya smiled earnestly at him before she pushed her unfinished bowl to the side and grabbed her glass of wine instead. “It’s seriously frowned upon. I would lose all academic merit if the board found out about it – which they would by the way.” She stopped to take a sip of her wine, finding comfort in the sharp aftertaste. “Not to mention what would happen to her. One of my colleagues had an affair with a student a couple of years back, the girl refused to mention what professor she had been involved with, but the rest of the students either treated her like she was either a slut or a leper. I wouldn’t want that for Trixie.”

Katya’s eyes widened as she realized they were talking about the situation with her and Trixie like there even was one to begin with. “Not that I’ve even tried anything with her, not at all. I’m not even sure if she likes women.” She added. “I shouldn’t even be talking to you about this – I feel ashamed of myself.”

Justin gave her a soft smile and stood up to go and stand behind her, his long arms wrapping her into a hug. “Don’t be ashamed because you feel something for someone. It might not be the right situation for you to get in, but you’re only human Kat.” He mumbled into her ear. The feeling of tears burning behind her eyes made Katya question her sanity. Two weeks ago, she had been fine. Trixie Mattel was just an incredibly hot student of hers, nothing more and nothing less. Then, everything had begun to twist around in Katya’s head. The feeling of Trixie’s soft fingers on her neck was what had sealed the deal, as if she needed any reminders of how desperate she was for any type of attention. She really was pitiful.

“Please don’t tell anyone, especially not Ginger.” Katya whispered, stroking Justin’s forearms that were locked around her shoulders. She felt a kiss on top of her head and then he retreated his arms. “You know I would never do that.”

 

* * *

 

 

When she had first seen Trixie in the movie theatre, she was stumped. She had discussed the young blonde with Justin, whom she was with, a few nights prior. A fleeting anxious thought wondered if there was any chance she knew. Trixie couldn’t know, Katya barely even knew what was going on. When Kim Chi called out her name, Katya didn’t know whether to run or hide behind Justin but kept her game face on as she realized she wasn’t one of the girls that were calling her name, she was an adult and she needed to behave as such.

Katya was quick to notice the blush on Trixie’s cheeks, something that appeared to be present every time Katya was around her. It made her want to reach out and cup that cheek, to feel if it was as soft as she envisioned it to be. Instead, they made small talk and Kim managed to embarrass Trixie all but two times. Katya was cheery, polite, and most importantly – no one could clock her. The only person that knew the truth besides her was Justin, and he was too busy staring Trixie down to bother anything she was doing. Truthfully, the way Trixie was dressed made her seem even younger than she already was, which was something that did not play well in Katya’s favour. _‘Oh, but she is gorgeous.’_ Katya thought to herself as she waved goodbye to the girls, trying to pretend like tearing herself away from Trixie wasn’t one of the hardest things she had to do.

She was pathetic.

Justin warned her. Now that he had gotten a good look at Trixie, he seemed to have decided for himself that he needed to put a stop to it. It was like he didn’t even hear that all Katya replied was that there was no chance of her attempting to follow through with anything. It got to the point where he had whispered in her ear for so long whilst she had tried to watch the movie that she got worried Trixie might hear them. Katya wouldn’t dare to look back at her. She felt silly, what good would this get her? She could mail a letter to her parents that they were right after all, she was nothing but a failure.

 

* * *

 

 

_“Вам необходимо выйти из нашего дома прямо сейчас, я не хочу снова видеть Вас!” (I want you to exit this house right now, I never want to see you again!) her mother shouted, the tears streaming down Katya’s cheeks seemed to make no difference for her. Their large estate felt foreign to her now, it had for a long time._

_“Мама, извините - просьба не сделать меня отпуска. Я не могу оставить вас.” (Mama, I’m sorry – please don’t make me leave. I can’t leave you.) She exclaimed and sunk to her knees on the hard-stone floor of their hallway. Katya’s mother simply huffed and pushed Katya’s bags towards her._

_“Я не могу не поддержать таким образом вы живете, девочки. У вас есть образование, перейти сделать нечто самостоятельно.” (I cannot support the way you live, girl. You have an education, go make something of yourself.)_

_“Do not speak to her in Russian, Женщина. She needs to go to USA and find perverted people like her.” Her father shouted from the living room in broken English. He couldn’t even be bothered to get up and kick her out himself. Katya searched for some pity in her mother’s eyes, the same eyes that used to view her with such love. That was all in the past, ever since they had found out her secret. Her father used to tell her that there was no limit to love, but he was a liar. They were prepared to exile her from the family due to the person she loved._

_Katya gathered what strength she had left and stood up, grabbed her bags and headed towards the door. She opened it and looked back at her mother one last time. “Если вы разрешите мне идти пешком через эту дверь, вы никогда не увидите Меня снова.” (If you let me walk through this door, you will never see me again.) Katya seethed, and was disappointed yet again as her mother simply turned around and walked away. So, she closed the door, now forced to find another destiny for herself, one that wouldn’t involve her family._

 

* * *

 

 

And she never saw them again. Katya had come to the US in hopes of finding people like her, or perverts, as her father would call them. Even though she was still so young, she managed to pull through. Her career meant everything to her, because it was the physical proof of her struggles and what she had been forced to do in order to overcome them.  She couldn’t let whatever feelings she imagined herself to have for her student become the thing that separated her from her success. She wouldn’t.

Yet, whenever she was around Trixie it seemed like there was nothing else that mattered. She had helped her clean up her floor, the way her blonde locks had framed her face as she bent down, her yellow dress riding up over her smooth legs made Katya go crazy with want. She had to control herself. She always did this, she fell too fast and was unable to pick herself up – this was a common mistake Katya made.

The seminar in Paris should excite her, but going at it alone wasn’t an option for her. Even if she had to talk herself down, there was an overwhelming possibility that she wouldn’t be able to calm down in time for her meeting. She could never ask Trixie to come with her, that would be too awkward of a vacation for both women; Katya wasn’t entirely sure that she would be doing it out of the interests of her student either. The person she needed was Ginger. The small woman was a spitfire, always truthful and always very fierce. Something about Ginger made Katya feel like that fifteen-year-old girl again, one who could get a green card due to her father’s connections in the states. It was the last favour he had done for her, when she had found that envelope at her friend’s house, filled with the sorted-out paper work and a promise to send cash at her convenience, on the condition that she never attempted to contact them again – only through a bank statement on her father’s credit card.  Katya had first met Ginger when she was looking for an extremely cheap apartment that would help as she made her way through school, Ginger being the grumpy twenty-two-year-old that lived in the studio opposite from her own.

When she considered how everything worked out for her, she was not the unluckiest girl in the world. She had judged Trixie for obviously being as privileged as a mayor’s daughter could be – but even though her parents had disowned her, they were the only reason why she could build a solid life for herself in this new, strange country. At times, Katya found herself missing the comfort of living at home in Moscow. The fact that she was unable to be herself and love whomever she wanted to love certainly but a damper on things, but the prospects of being able to walk down the park, feeling the crisp air in her face was something Katya could see herself paying a lot of money for.

But she couldn’t return to Russia. Not only because of the horrible politics, but also because it reminded her of _them_. Those who must not be named, as Justin liked to call her parents. As the days before her departure to France began to tick down at a rapid speed, she had to get Trixie caught up on the work she needed to do whilst Katya was gone. She had hired one of the doctorate students to handle her classes the week she was gone, but Trixie had promised to help with grading as well. She was an angel.

“Okay, so when you grade these – remember to look out for the trick questions. I tried to be as sneaky as I could, but I think a lot of them got them anyway.” Katya informed Trixie as she sat on her desk, slowly distributing papers to Trixie, who sat in a chair beside her. She glanced over at the young woman and saw her defined brows furrow, a concerned look on her face. “If this is too much, you can let Nina look at them. I don’t want to distract you from your studies.” She quipped, smiling as Trixie looked up to meet her gaze.

“No, no it’s fine. I just didn’t know you would be gone for an entire week.” Trixie replied, seemingly unsure of herself as she delicately tucked the papers Katya had given her on her lap.

Katya cocked her head to the side, wondering what had prompted Trixie to wonder such a thing. Shouldn’t she be happy that Katya was gone for a while, as she wouldn’t need to come down to her office three times a week. “I thought you would be pleased, less work and more play for you. Make sure to take some time for yourself, let your hair down and do what other college students do.” She joked, silently hoping that Trixie would dispute her.

“I kind of like our meetings though, it doesn’t always feel like work.” Trixie muttered as she looked down on her papers again. Katya’s heart pounded in her chest as she tentatively stood up and placed a shaky hand on Trixie’s shoulder. “I think you’ll survive without my wit, Trixie.”

As she headed over to sit down in her desk chair again, Katya swore she could have heard Trixie mumble: “Maybe I can’t.”

“I’ll bring you back a croissant.” Katya sighed as she slumped down in her chair, pleased as she elicited a giggle from Trixie. “Now, get going or you’ll be late for class.” Katya clapped her hands together loudly, a giggle erupting from her throat as Trixie jumped in her seat from the sudden noise.

She watched Trixie as she agreed and headed off to class, Katya only said good bye as she looked towards her office computer. Deep in thought, she barely even noticed her door open again until she felt a pair of strong arms engulf her in a hug. She jumped, startled at the sudden contact before she smelt a familiar wave of perfume. “Have a safe flight.” Trixie whispered, barely giving Katya a chance to hug her back before she was gone again.

Katya was a horrible person, and she had been royally screwed over by Trixie Mattel and her ways.

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hola! Disclaimer: I'm sorry if this feels kind of rushed, I had sort of a writer's block when trying to get this done (school work be damned) - so you'll have to excuse me. Either way, as always, I am incredibly happy for all of the nice comments and kudos on this fic, you guys are literally the best. I got a message regarding how long this fic will be, and I thought I would mention here as well that there will probably be around fifteen chapters of Geronimo. There might be an epilogue as well, but since I have a serious problem with completing fics, fifteen seems reasonable enough for me to get done. As always, I hope you like this chapter, and happy readings my doves!

 

Trixie had been walking around on clouds all day. She sang quietly to herself as she applied her makeup, not noticing the confused looks she was on the receiving end of by her roommate. “Are you okay?” Kim asked, prompting a snort from her friend.

“Of course I’m okay, it’s Sasha’s birthday and we’re taking her out for brunch – that sounds like a perfect way to start our day.” Trixie retorted whilst meticulously applying contour powder to her already sculpted cheeks. Her way of applying makeup to herself hadn’t always been appreciated for the work of art she herself considered it to be, but at least no-one could say she wasn’t committed to the cause.

“That’s a crock of shit, my birthday was last month and you weren’t this excited then.” Kim huffed. She wasn’t wrong in her sentiment, there was more than one reason behind Trixie’s good mood which did not necessarily relate to her friend’s birthday. Katya was coming home. She had been in Paris for nearly a week, and had sent Trixie an e-mail the previous evening that she was finally coming home. A week wasn’t that long, but not being in Katya’s presence every other day felt wrong. Trixie was supposed to be there with her, not seeing the eccentric Russian woman every day made Trixie feel off-balance. “I was just as happy when it was your birthday, I even got you that manga-thing you wanted.” Trixie chuckled, not noticing the scowl on Kim’s face as she continued to focus on her face.

“First of all, it’s called an anime, second – you know perfectly well what ‘Pokémon’ is.” Kim huffed. Trixie rolled her eyes, setting down her brushes in front of her. “I just watched Digimon, sorry.”

When they finally got to the restaurant they had picked out for Sasha’s big day, Violet, Sasha and Pearl were already there. Sasha beamed as they arrived, hugging Trixie close as she attacked the birthday girl with her arms. “One year older, how does it feel?” Trixie asked as she let go of her friend and sat down next to her.

“Like I’m one year closer to death.” Sasha retorted as a waitress came up to them, plates of food in her arms. “We took the liberty of ordering for you two.” Violet explained, her tone insinuating that they were sick of waiting for Trixie and Kim, whom were usually late to their get together’s. Trixie smiled at the waitress as a plate of food was set down in front of her, her mouth watered at the sight of veggie hot dogs and scrambled eggs.

“You’re such a good friend, Vi.” Kim replied sarcastically as the girls dug in on their food. Trixie had a habit of gulfing down her meals like she wouldn’t get fed any time soon, so she found it difficult to swallow and reply when Sasha addressed her: “So, are you heading over to Katya this afternoon? Kim told me she was coming home today.”

“Oh, yeah. She asked me if we could look over the material list for next week.” Trixie quipped as she set down her fork. Nervousness bubbled up within her as she noticed that Violet and Pearl rolled their eyes at her. “What?” she asked, slightly offended.

“You are such a teacher’s pet.” Violet sassed her, the look in her eyes challenging Trixie as she took a sip of her coffee. “I am not, I get paid to be there.” Trixie countered, hoping that her tone was convincing enough to not raise any more suspicion than she already had.

“You get paid to have permanent lady-boners.” Pearl muttered, an evil smile appearing on her lips. Trixie’s eyes bulged as the rest of her friends laughed at her. She was nearly certain that Pearl had meant it as a joke, but if she only knew how she was in fact perfectly correct in her assessment, Trixie would be in big trouble. “You are gross.” She muttered half-heartedly, not finding a better comeback to fling at her friend and decided to return to her food for the rest of the morning.

 

* * *

 

 

She sat down in what was now considered her chair, Katya’s now cleaned office surrounding her. She heard footsteps stomping down the hallway, a sound that could only be linked to her professor. Trixie gulped as the door handle shook, before it flung open to reveal a flushed Katya.

” Oh, hey.” Trixie blushed as Katya scurried into her office. The time Katya had been gone was put to good use by Trixie, or so she thought. She had cleaned Katya’s office completely, leaving neat stacks of papers on her worn, wooden desk. There had been an alarming number of Chinese take-out boxes in a cupboard, which made her question whether there would be enough time in the world to fix what could potentially be moulding in there. Deciding not to push her luck, she had cleaned out the boxes, thrown in an air-freshener and closed it.

She thought she had done a good job, but the expression on Katya’s face as she scanned around the room made Trixie wonder if she had been too intrusive. She shrunk in her seat, her big eyes scanning over Katya as she looked over her now tidy office space. “Looks like you’ve made yourself right at home.” Katya finally commented as she slumped down in her seat, behind her desk and opposite from an embarrassed Trixie. The sternness in Katya’s tone formed a stone in Trixie’s stomach, panic washing over her.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t stop to think that it might be too much.” She squeaked, damning herself internally for the mousey tone she got when Katya scolded her. As she looked over at her professor, Katya’s once stern features softened as she noticed how uncomfortable she had made the young woman. “It’s okay, I just like my thing where they are – I know it seems weird, but if the place is a little cluttered it makes it easier for me to think. It feels good knowing that my mind isn’t the messiest thing about me.” Katya explained, the stone in Trixie’s stomach lightening as she nodded along as the older woman clarified her demeanour.

Trixie smiled and shuffled in her seat, looking down at her lap as she felt her cheeks flush. “Hey, I actually have something for you.” Katya beckoned, a joyous smile spread across Trixie’s cheeks as she looked up at Katya again.

Katya leant down to pick something up from her over filled purse, bursting out a triumphant; “Aha!” as she found what she had been scrambling around her bag for. Trixie couldn’t help but to laugh as a zip-lock bag was thrown over at her, a shriek erupting from her throat as she saw a crumbled pastry inside of the bag. “What is this?” she asked between giggles.

Katya leant back in her chair, legs propped up on her desk and her arms behind her head. “I told you I would bring you back a croissant, didn’t I?” Katya sighed at the bagged mush. “I just misjudged how well it travels.”

Endearment swelled in Trixie’s chest as she opened the bag and picked out a piece of her ruined pastry. She put it in her mouth, chewing carefully as Katya watched her. In all honesty, it was stale and left Trixie with a dry throat; but the thought of Katya remembering her whilst she was on her trip made up for it. “It’s good, I feel very French now.” Trixie grimaced as she tried to swallow the last of the dry pastry and saw Katya cock a brow, an amused smirk playing on her lips. “You are a terrible liar, Trixie Mattel – I think my will to be cute sort of over-powered my logic, I should have brought you back a trinket or something.”

“If you wanted me to think you were cute, you really didn’t have to try so hard.” Trixie mused. Only when she saw the baffled expression on Katya’s face, did she realize the insinuation of what she had just said. She was an idiot. “So, how did your seminar go? Were they nice?” she hurriedly continued, desperate to change the subject.

Katya still looked surprised, but clearly tried to suppress it as she scratched the back of her head and replied shakily: “Yeah, sure. I – uh, they want to give me a spot in their annual conference next year, so that’s good.”

Trixie’s eyes widened as she listened to what Katya said, the thought of her professor earning such an honour for her work made her so proud. “Katya, that is amazing, congratulations!” she exclaimed, an insatiable urge to run over and hug Katya welling up in her.

Katya seemed to have thought the same thing, since she briskly stood up and went to stand beside Trixie, arms stretched out. “Thank you, Tracy.” She laughed as Trixie stood up as well and engulfed the older woman in a deep hug. Trixie had always been told that she was a great hugger, they were always warm and meaningful – now more so than ever as she smelt Katya’s perfume all over her body. She tentatively leaned her chin down on Katya’s shoulder, trying to breathe in her scent discretely enough so she wouldn’t seem like such a creep.

Judging by the misstep Trixie had made earlier by admitting that she thought Katya was cute, she wondered if the hug was out of pity to try and console her fragile, young mind. “Katya?” she mumbled, hearing a ‘hmm?’ rumble quietly out of Katya’s throat. “I didn’t mean what I said before.” She continued, her last ditch-effort to try and stay within the line of professionality. Of course, she knew that ship had sailed – she was inching towards that line where it was apparently impossible for her to keep her mouth shut. Yet, Katya wouldn’t let her go. Why had she wanted to hug Trixie? It was like the other woman could read her mind, like her thoughts weren’t entirely her own. Trixie suddenly felt scared that whatever she thought wouldn’t be for herself anymore, could Katya read minds?

Finally, Katya leaned back from their embrace. Trixie was just about to let her go and sit back down when Katya placed her hands on Trixie’s hips, holding onto her. Brown eyes met blue ones, their faces just mere inches away from each other. Even though Trixie practically towered over Katya, she still felt so tiny when the Russian woman held her – her intense gaze nearly making Trixie uncomfortable as she stared back into those brilliant blue orbs. There was something unreadable in Katya’s expression, like she was pondering over what wire needed to be cut in order to dismantle a bomb. It felt like they stayed that way forever. Trixie gulped, afraid to say anything that would break the spell between them.

“Trixie, I— “Katya murmured, hands tightening around Trixie’s skin. Deciding not to let her own fears get the better of her, Trixie proceeded to lean in, desperate to feel Katya’s lips against her own. She needed to lament what was happening between them, to know she wasn’t just crazy. She didn’t stop to seek approval from Katya, deciding for herself that the signs evident on the way she was holding her and not moving back was proof enough.

Her sense of optimism was cut short as their lips were about to meet and Katya moved her head to the side. Trixie’s lips burned as she felt Katya’s cheek, the swift sensation of her skin against her own bittersweet as she realized she wasn’t going to get what she craved the most. Trixie inhaled sharply as she leaned back, her own hands now pressing on Katya’s to get her to let go. Katya did so without protest and tears started to well up behind Trixie’s eyes as she stepped back, knocking down her chair as she backed right into it. She winced at the sound of it hitting the floor before she realized she still stood right in front of Katya. ‘ _Go get your coat Trixie. It’s on the hanger by the door. Go get it now and leave.’_ She thought to herself, panic overflowing every other emotion she was currently experiencing. “I – I need to go.” She whispered, rushing by Katya to get her coat. She had worn her yellow rain coat, knowing that it made her look adorable. She had worn it because she knew Katya would like it, and in extension find her adorable as well.

As she rushed over to the hanger, she tore her coat down and flung it across her body, hastily buttoning it as she stared down at the ground. “Trixie, please don’t leave like this.” She heard a plea coming from behind her. A thin hand stretched across her shoulder, but Trixie just shrugged it off. Katya sounded sad, but not as sad as Trixie was. “I can’t believe you.” She seethed, anger flowing through her core as she couldn’t get that last button to clasp. “I’m just a kid, aren’t I? Just a stupid kid that thought you meant something by _that_ , whatever it was.” She continued as she gave up on her coat and proceeded to burn a hole through the floor with her stare.

“Trixie, it’s not that easy. Just… don’t leave and we can talk about it. Please.” Katya continued to plead, her voice trembling as she spoke. In any other situation, Trixie would be the first to console her, making sure that everything was okay – but she couldn’t do that now. The only thing she could do was to leave, and so she did. As she slammed the door behind her she could hear a faint sigh, only this one was filled with sorrow.

 

* * *

 

 

As soon as she got to her room, Trixie flung off her coat and plummeted down onto her bed; her face squished into her pillow. Only then would she let her tears out, a sob erupting from her throat. She knew Kim was in there, but she just didn’t care. How had things gone from good too bad in a matter of minutes? After having looked at her watch, Trixie had only been in there for half an hour, how could those thirty minutes have changed everything? She felt the side of her bed bend down as Kim sat down, a hand appeared on her back and stroking it gently. “What happened? Weren’t you with Ms. Zamo?” Kim asked carefully, the mention of Katya’s name prompting another sob to escape Trixie. She was crying uncontrollably now, and she knew she needed to explain herself to her friend. ‘ _I need someone besides myself and Katya to know about this._ ’ She reasoned with herself as she continued to weep, her voice coming out in sobs: “Please don’t judge me for this.”

The hand on her back stopped dead in its tracks, Kim knew what was going on. “I would never judge you, Trix’.” Kim replied gently, her obvious attempt to stay calm was exposed by the weariness of her voice.

“I tried to kiss her.” Trixie cried, “I tried to kiss her and now I’ve ruined everything.”

She could sense Kim tensing up, a natural reaction given what Trixie had just admitted to her. They spent a moment in silence, which only made things worse for Trixie. She rolled over and sat up on her bed, leaning her back against the wall. “Please say something.” She pleaded with her friend as she saw the shocked expression on Kim’s face.

“I’m just shocked that you actually did something about it.” Kim finally replied. She seemed hesitant to say anything else, probably in the hopes of not making Trixie cry even harder than she already was. “What do you mean?” Trixie asked reluctantly, reaching up to wipe her tears. She looked at her hand for a moment, her mascara and eyeliner had formed tracks on her hand.

“I knew you had some type of thing for Katya, but I never thought you would act on it.” Kim explained, her hands fiddling with the hem of her shirt. “Trixie, you know what I have to say, don’t you?” she continued, her words made a fresh batch of tears roll down Trixie’s cheeks. She knew Kim was right, and whatever she had to say was justified; Trixie just wasn’t sure if she could hear it. Regardless of that, she simply nodded at Kim, allowing her to continue.

“Maybe it’s for the best if nothing happened? I know that it hurts when you put yourself out there, but I think Katya was just looking out for the both of you.” Kim looked apologetic as she spoke, knowing that her words would only cause her friend more pain.

“I know.” Trixie replied, unable to look at her friend anymore.

“I’m not trying to make you even more sad, but I had to say that. Friends are honest with one another.” Kim reasoned, her motherly nature shining through as she attempted to talk some sense into Trixie.

“I know.” She said again, laying down again on her side. Kim’s hand returned to stroke through her hair, gently pulling at Trixie’s hair sprayed locks. “That doesn’t make it any easier though, does it?” Trixie continued, her eyes starting to well up again.

“No, it doesn’t. I’m so sorry, Trixie.” Kim consoled her, having apparently decided to drop her lecture.

“You can’t tell anyone about this, please promise me that you won’t.” Trixie whimpered, hoping that Kim would let her keep the secret of her failed attempt of romance with her professor from the other girls.

“I would never tell anyone unless you told me it was okay; I promise your secret is safe with me.” Kim assured her, laying down as well to drape Trixie in a bear hug.

“Thank you.” Trixie replied, her voice muffled by Kim’s hair that had landed right in her face. “What are you going to do about your job? I totally don’t think you have to stay there if you don’t want to.” Kim asked, her question opening an entirely new dimension to Trixie’s issues. She hadn’t even thought about what she would do about her job. She obviously couldn’t see Katya anymore, that much was clear to her, but she loved that job. It angered her that she couldn’t keep her urges to herself.

“I can’t be around her after this, I’ll just have to quit. Fuck.” Trixie grumbled under her breath, a small sense of comfort passing through her as Kim hugged her even tighter. “It’s going to be okay, I promise. Just sleep on it and we’ll talk about it more tomorrow.”

But Trixie couldn’t fall asleep that night, her thoughts occupied by the sensation of feeling like they were finally going to culminate their relationship. Feeling Katya’s soft skin underneath her own buzzed around her mind, making it impossible to fall asleep. Why did she hold onto her hips like that? Why didn’t she move away from Trixie? Why couldn’t she have just told Trixie thank you, and they could have gotten back to work. That hug had ruined everything.

If Trixie had stayed long enough before bolting down the corridor, away from Katya’s office, she would have been able to hear a sniffle coming from the older woman. Her hands shook violently as she grabbed her cigarettes and a lighter from her purse. She headed over to her window, propping it open before she lit her cigarette and leaned out from the perch of her small window. She had seen her own reflection just before she had opened it, a faint trace of pink lips on her cheek. Katya had done the right thing. As she had looked back at Trixie, nothing seemed more important than being close to her – but as she had leaned in to kiss Katya, Justin’s words echoed in her mind.

She couldn’t do that to Trixie, dragging her into a world of trouble wasn’t just wrong, it was enough to make Katya reconsider what Ginger had told her all those years ago; “ _You are a good person Katya, you just need to see that for yourself, bitch.”_ Katya wasn’t a good person. She had fallen in love with her student, a student that clearly reciprocated her feelings – and Katya had taken advantage of her.

Katya took a final drag of her cigarette, dropping the butt of her now finished cigarette before she closed her window again. She looked over her office and noticed that the chair Trixie had knocked down was still on the floor, so she made her way over there and propped it up again. If Katya wanted to kiss her, then why would that be so wrong? Every sense of reason she had told her that Trixie deserved better than what Katya could offer her, but she needed happiness too. The truth of the matter was what Katya felt genuinely happy whenever the young blonde was around her, her positivity infectious on an old mind such as her own.

But she shouldn’t. Even though every urge she had told her to run after Trixie, or to send her an e-mail that they needed to meet up.

She had to suppress it, for Trixie’s sake. Soon enough, she would understand why Katya did what she did. She had to.

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;)

Katya spent the following days doing her best to avoid Trixie. She knew that her student would be unwilling to see her as well, given how their conversation had ended, so she sent out a too formal e-mail to her that said Katya wouldn’t need any help that week. In all honesty, she felt like help was all she needed. She felt like telling anybody at that point would prove to be a mistake, even if she knew that her friends wouldn’t judge her. Justin was the one person she felt like would be able to talk to openly enough for him to fully understand, but she had already promised him that she would shut it down way before it had gotten to the point it had.

Nevertheless, Katya stayed in her lane and hoped that when the day came that she needed to see Trixie in her classroom it wouldn’t be as hard. Despite her best efforts, she couldn’t help but to put on a black dress with embroidered flowers on it, knowing that the loose fit and long sleeves made her look good. She had a class with Trixie that day, and she needed to look better than she felt.

Once Katya had gotten to her lecture hall, the students began to drop in shortly thereafter. She had hoped that Trixie wouldn’t be there today, if she wasn’t then Katya would be able to talk herself down a bit. She tried to calm herself down a bit by writing up the lecture’s agenda on the white board, knowing that when she turned around it was go-time. She couldn’t get nervous, because they would know that something was wrong. Katya needed to keep all suspicion to a minimum.

As she turned around, the first person she noticed was Kim. The young girl had a nervous look on her face, something that told Katya that she knew. Beside her was Violet, Sasha and Trixie. Katya couldn’t help but to stare at her as she began her lecture. The young woman was in a long, black dress, no makeup and her blonde hair in a tight ponytail. She looked nothing like herself. All Katya wanted to do was to run over there, hug and kiss her and tell her that everything was going to be okay. Instead, she just stared until a student coughed awkwardly, forcing Katya out of her trance.

She looked down on her papers and continued her class, her word jumbling with a heavier Russian accent than she usually had, something that she knew indicated that she was nervous. When Katya looked up, Trixie stared back at her. The younger woman clearly attempted to look indifferent, but Katya knew better. If she could just get through the class, then she could go home. Whatever work she had to do would have to wait until the next day, all she needed now was a glass of wine and about a whole pack of cigarettes.

 

* * *

 

 

Trixie pounded on Katya’s door. She had been crazy enough to go against her better judgement when Katya had been missing from her office and simply look up the address to her teacher. To say that their conversation couldn’t have waited until the next day would be a lie, but the need for privacy regarding their discussion made Katya’s apartment seem ideal. After she had pounded on the door enough times, she stood back a few steps and stared at the black door that had _her_ name on it until she finally heard some rustling behind it. In any other situation, she would have laughed at the fact that Katya seemed to have at least five different locks on her door that she needed to unlock before opening her door, however, Trixie’s foul mood did not lighten as she waited impatiently for it to open.

Finally, Katya stood in front of her; black culottes barely hugging her body along with another version of a deep, red blouse hanging loosely on her torso. Her curly hair was in banana clip, the mess of it suggesting she had been up to something before Trixie had interrupted her. “Trixie, what are you doing here?” Katya frowned, staring at her student with confused eyes.

“I can’t work for you anymore.” Trixie blurted out, slowly feeling her courage drain from her as she looked back at the object of her affections. Katya appeared to be struck by her words, a flash of hurt going across her face. Nevertheless, she extended an arm and grabbed a hold of Trixie’s arm, rushing her into her apartment. Trixie allowed herself to be tugged along, brown eyes quickly darting over the cozy, bohemian apartment that seemed so Katya in a way that was almost laughable. Katya said nothing more as she made a right turn into what appeared to be her kitchen, leaving Trixie in the hallway. “Come here.” Katya called out for her, leaving Trixie to quickly scrap off her coat onto a hanger and follow the older woman into her small kitchen. She sat down on one of the green lounge chairs Katya had chosen for her small kitchen table and watched as she placed a kettle of water onto her stove.

“So, you’re not going to stay on board with me?” Katya asked absentmindedly as she pulled a packet of chai tea as well as a bottle of honey from a cupboard. “N-no. I don’t think I can.” Trixie mumbled, trying to take in the surrealistic situation she found herself in. She still had on the same outfit from earlier in the day, and knew that she looked like shit which only made things worse for her as Katya looked as stunningly beautiful as ever.

Katya set the packet of tea and honey onto the table with a loud smash, making Trixie’s whole body jump out of her seat. Katya grabbed two cups and the now wheezing kettle and went to sit down opposite from her. She prepared their tea for them, pushing Trixie’s cup towards her. Trixie took it carefully, muttering a quick ‘thanks’ to Katya, who seemingly ignored it as she sipped on her tea. “Trixie, I know I haven’t been fair, but I don’t want you to give up an opportunity like this because of me.” Katya stated calmly, blue eyes peering over at her. Even though Trixie had been the one to try and kiss her, Katya still appeared to be so selfless. Trixie suddenly felt bad for snapping at her and thinking those horrible things about her teacher. She wasn’t innocent in this, but she had certainly tried to play it off like it had been all Katya’s fault.

“I know that, it’s just that I can’t pretend like nothing happened when that’s really, _really_ not the case.” Trixie replied softly, trying a different approach. There was no point in hiding behind coy messages or trying to ease her way into their conversation. They both knew what happened and needed to talk about it like adults.

“You have to understand the position I’m in. If anyone were to find out about this, I would lose all credibility in my career and you might be doomed of ever having one.” Katya tried to reason with her, the convinced tone in her voice never quite meeting the look she was currently giving Trixie. There was something restrained her features, her hands grasping her cup of tea until her knuckles went completely white. Trixie then realised that she had two options; she could walk out of there without her job and try to avoid Katya for the remainder of the school year, or she could fight for what she wanted. She chose the latter. “But you still haven’t told me that you don’t want this.” Trixie retorted with a new sense of poise. Katya proceeded to stare down at the table, setting her cup down before she answered. “I don’t.”

“Yes, you do.” Trixie knew that it was now or never, and extended her hand to lace her fingers through Katya’s. Her fingers were cold and trembling, but she still let Trixie run her thumb over her palm. Despite of their situation, holding onto Katya seemed normal and effortless. Katya appeared to have settled down a bit, and squeezed Trixie’s hand before she retracted her own from their grasp. “It doesn’t matter.” Katya determined before standing up yet again and walking towards her small refrigerator on the other end of the room, opening it up and scanning for what was inside. She needed to escape this conversation before it went too far. Trixie felt herself going numb again, having been turned down twice was more than she could handle, yet she felt herself ready to try one final time.

 

* * *

 

 

She stood up, hearing Katya ask her if she would like something to eat but ignored her as she went to stand beside the Russian woman. Katya looked up and glanced over at Trixie, a plate of what appeared to be Paella in her hands. Trixie tried her best to stare right into Katya’s blue orbs, hoping that her determination shined through her exterior.

Katya set down her plate, gulping at the look in Trixie’s eyes before she set the plate back into the fridge and walked closer to her. All sense of reason left her body as she reached up to cup Trixie’s cheek in her hand. Trixie leaned into her touch, Katya’s cold hand soothing against her heated skin. Deciding to give that final try a chance, Trixie leaned in towards Katya and stopped only when their faces were just inches away to see if there was any hesitation left between them. ‘ _Please don’t reject me again, please don’t.’_ Trixie thought to herself as she watched Katya’s internal struggle between turning Trixie down or not. Ready to give up and walk away, Trixie began to lean back once more – a sigh escaping her pink lips.

 

Katya responded by draping both arms around Trixie’s neck and dragged her down again to close the distance between them.

Both women immediately got lost in their flurry of kisses, clinging onto each other like it was a question of life or death. Trixie moaned lightly as Katya turned them around and crowded her against the nearest wall. Katya growled quietly as her mouth left Trixie’s and turned to attack her neck instead.

Trixie tried her best to keep up, despite feeling a familiar burning sensation in her lower stomach. She drew one leg up to bind Katya’s body against her own, desperate to feel her even closer. “Katya...” she mumbled in the older woman’s ear, shivers going down her spine as Katya sucked on her neck, undoubtedly leaving a mark.

Katya’s lips left Trixie’s neck, her mind racing as she looked back onto Trixie’s flushed face and whispered; “I’ve wanted to do this for so long.” before she leaned in to press their lips together again. Trixie’s heart fluttered at the notion of Katya finally admitting to her that she had felt the same way Trixie did, but was left with no time to process it as Katya opened her pink lips up, their kiss now slower.

She dragged her hands through Katya’s hair, undoing the banana clip in her hair and tossing it to the ground before she continued massaging her own lips against her. She could feel herself growing more and more anxious to take it one step further, but still wanted to savour their first intimate moment with each other without it needing to go any further.

When Trixie considered it, despite of how good Katya’s lips felt against her own and the pit of fire growing in her abdomen – she needed to leave it like it was. They needed more time. So, she reluctantly gave Katya one last kiss before leaning her head back. Katya gazed into her eyes, her own glassy and filled with the need to continue their encounter. After clearing her mind a bit more, she panted: “Are you okay?”. Katya needed to know that Trixie hadn’t changed her mind, that this wasn’t a point she had to prove or a game she wanted to play, because Katya had just gone against everything she knew was right and now only wanted more from the beautiful young woman in front of her.

Trixie smiled at Katya’s consideration, and couldn’t help but to giggle at the mess of red and pink lipstick moulded on the older woman’s lips and cheeks. Her foot slumped back down to the floor and she drew Katya into a long hug instead. “I think we need to leave it to the kissing part for now, but you are amazing.” She mumbled into Katya’s ear, earning a content sigh from her.

“I think that’s the best idea you’ve had so far, Tracy.” Katya snorted whilst giggling and retracting herself from Trixie’s grasp. “Let’s go sit down on the couch.” She continued and took Trixie’s hands in her own, tugging her along behind her as she slumped down on her comfortable white sofa. It was the only thing in Katya’s apartment that was white, and probably the only white item she had that hadn’t been smudged with something or miscoloured. She liked to keep it neat, and watching Trixie sit down beside her was a sight for sore eyes.

Katya beamed at her, leaning her palm forward to try and clean the smudge that had formed around Trixie’s lips. Trixie chuckled in response and did the same to Katya, both women quietly admitting that they both looked like hot messes. “I don’t think these kinds of lipstick are supposed to mix.” Katya retorted, trying her best to give Trixie this upbeat and calm version of herself that the young woman deserved; yet she could already feel the anxiety bubbling up within her. She had to push it down, Katya wanted to have a nice moment with the woman she adored, without having to think of the consequences it would bring.

“I think they mix just fine.” Trixie replied softly, scooting herself closer and closer to Katya until she had her legs flung across her lap, arms around Katya’s thin waist. Trixie smiled as Katya draped an arm over her shoulders, allowing Trixie to lean her head down on the crook of Katya’s arm. “I’m sorry if I was too… Much, I guess. I’ve just had that pent up inside of me for so long.” Katya apologized, apparently unable to go too long without apologizing to Trixie about something.

The older woman smiled as she felt tiny kisses dropped on her collarbone, and squeezed her arm around Trixie a bit tighter. “Don’t apologize, you were being passionate. It’s not like I don’t think you were right before, but we can’t always just be rational. It doesn’t work like that.” Trixie replied wisely, once again showing Katya that she was mature well beyond her young age. Katya exhaled contently and turned her head to capture Trixie’s lips again in a chaste kiss.

“I’m going to be perfectly honest with you right now, okay?” Katya stated as she broke their kiss, turning slightly so she could get Trixie’s full attention. The younger woman nodded, a smirk playing on her lips. “I have no fucking clue of what I’m doing here.” She continued, prompting a nervous chuckle from Trixie.

“Me neither. You’re not the only one that thought this might have been a bad idea at first, Katya.” Trixie retorted, noting that Katya seemed more at ease when she heard she hadn’t been the only one with doubts. “Maybe we shouldn’t think too much about it for now? I know that’s hard for you to do, but I’m not going to say anything to anyone.”

Katya smiled earnestly at her response, knowing that what Trixie was saying might not be the full truth. She wasn’t one to judge, because she had told Justin nearly everything, but the thought of another student knowing what was going on between them made Katya nervous. She wasn’t ashamed of Trixie, but she was certainly ashamed of herself. “I do think we need to keep things between ourselves, I just don’t want this to be an issue.” Katya stated poignantly, hoping she was making herself very clear. “I’m sort of laying down my law right now, you know that there’s a lot about this that won’t be okay – are you ready to deal with that?”

“Katya, it’s fine.”

“I need you to tell me that you get this, Trixie.” Katya pushed the issue, Trixie needed to be fully aware of what she was getting herself into. “I get it. I still don’t think I should be your T-A anymore, to be honest. It seems weird that I’m sort of getting paid from you, it just wouldn’t feel comfortable to me.” Trixie replied whilst climbing over so she was sitting on Katya’s lap.

The vision of Trixie’s thick thighs spread across Katya’s lap was nearly more than she could handle. All she wanted to do was to throw the younger woman down on the coach and make her see stars, but Katya knew they needed to take things slow. So, she settled for running her hands up and down Trixie’s legs, the contact nearly making her drool. It still felt surreal for Trixie, like Katya was going to yank her hands away at any given time and make her leave. She realized that Katya had to do what she did, however, it still left Trixie with the unsettling feeling of still being scared. She never wanted Katya to leave her side.

“Are you okay with this?” Trixie asked, compelled to by her own fears and concerns. Katya always asked her if she was okay, but Trixie realized that she had never done the same to her. Katya had to think about Trixie’s sudden question for a moment. There was still a lot of worry that she needed to analyse to herself, but keeping away from Trixie had turned out to be an impossibility. All those hours in Katya’s office had felt like some type of foreplay, like this was where they were always supposed to end up; together. Yet, conflict still brewed within her, a feeling that apparently wasn’t going away any time soon. “I’m perfectly happy, I just don’t know if I deserve it just yet. I just don’t want you to think that I would ever want to do you any harm, no matter what comes of this.”

Katya’s response was heartfelt and made Trixie’s heart break. How could she think that Trixie would ever assume that she wanted anything bad for her? Any past reaction she had had come from disappointment and anger that she wasn’t going to get what she wanted, not that Katya ever had bad intentions for her. “I’m not sure if I deserve you, but I would like to try.” Trixie stopped to give Katya a slow kiss. “Can I stay here tonight?” she asked between kisses, hoping that any further boundaries could wait until some other day or some other time where she felt more together.

“Sure.” Katya replied against her better judgement, her eyes darting towards the other end of the room, where the door to her bedroom was. Trixie replied by kissing her senseless, Katya’s hands roaming her legs again in amazement.

As they laid down to sleep that night, bodies tangled into one another in Katya’s bed, both women wondered what tomorrow would bring for them. Both wondered if they would be able to keep their affair away from the insightful minds of their friends, but only one of them wondered whether or not she was taking advantage of the other. She knew what the answer was, but that was a question that had to be left for another day.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Meek, once again I am blown away by your immense support. I love you guys, really. I hope you enjoy this chapter! Happy readings my doves.

Trixie woke up feeling incredibly hot and with a slight headache. She opened her eyes reluctantly, a jolt running through her body as she did not recognize where she was – then, memories started to flood back in her mind. If the memories weren’t enough, then the arm slung across her waist certainly was. Katya was still asleep, her face nuzzled into Trixie’s chest. Trixie’s heart swelled with adoration of the snoring woman, a halo of curly blonde hair getting everywhere in her face, yet she was so mesmerized that she barely even noticed the tickling sensation on her face. She twisted lightly in Katya’s grip, the older woman responding by nuzzling even closer to her and tossing a toned leg over Trixie’s hip.

She snorted under her breath, Katya’s sleeping form had unconsciously locked her in an iron grip, and it was all Trixie could do to draw Katya even closer and place soft kisses onto her temple. She did not want to wake Katya up, but she realized that the Russian woman probably needed to head to work soon enough. They couldn’t stay in their personal form of heaven for forever. Trixie traced her locked in hand over Katya’s back, her arm in an awkward angle as she stroked lower and lower down her lover’s body. She could feel Katya stirring in her sleep, warm breaths onto Trixie’s chest. “Katya, don’t you need to go to work?” Trixie inquired softly, her hand resting on the curve of Katya’s lower back.

“Mm.” Katya murmured, retracting her grip on Trixie, whom watched as the older woman stretched out and laid down on her back. “What time is it?” Katya continued, forcing Trixie to turn around on the bed to take a quick glance on her phone that laid on Katya’s wooden bed side table.

Trixie turned back around to face Katya, trying to lay as seductively as she possibly could on her side. “It’s just past eight.” She murmured, tentatively laying a hand onto Katya’s flat stomach. Trixie frowned as Katya’s eyes widened, before she knew it the older woman had tossed the fluffy comforter to the side and bolted out of bed. She could hear Katya mutter obscenities as she jolted across her bedroom, grabbing a dress and a pair of tights as she went. Trixie sat up and picked her dress up from the floor. She stood up, tossing the sleeping shirt she had borrowed from Katya over her head and went to grab her bra. She didn’t even consider the fact that she had nothing on her torso before she heard a strangled moan coming from the other end of the room. She clipped her bra on and put everything in place before she turned around to look at Katya, a deep flush on her face. “Sorry.” Trixie winked, giggling at the roll of Katya’s brilliant eyes.

“No, you’re not.” Katya retorted as she finished pulling on a pair of brown boots that did not match her black wrap dress in the slightest.

“No, I’m not.”

Katya strolled across the room towards Trixie and wrapped both arms around her naked waist. “Don’t tease me.” She muttered as she reached up to plant a soft kiss on Trixie’s lips. “Don’t you have classes today?” Katya pressed her body against Trixie’s own, and she could feel the older woman’s heart thumping from where her chest met Trixie’s.  


“No, I just have to help Violet with her English homework later today.” Trixie mumbled in response as they swayed together in the middle of Katya’s bedroom. It seemed like they had done this forever, not less than twenty-four hours. Trixie felt so comfortable, standing there in Katya’s dark and bohemian apartment, pelts, odd pillows and scented candles in practically every corner of the place. “Okay, well, I have an extra key in the kitchen. It’s in a jar of sugar, take that and you can just hang around here for as long as you want.” Katya replied whilst peppering kisses onto Trixie’s collarbone. It shouldn’t surprise Trixie that Katya would think of hiding her extra key in a jar of sugar, but it still made her huff from the sheer ridiculousness of it all.

“When do you get off work? What I really mean by that is that I want to see you tonight.” Trixie asked bluntly, having decided for herself that if she could see every part of Katya more intimately, tonight would be the night to do so. She had assumed that they needed to take things slow, but there was nothing Trixie would like to do more than to see her lover writhe beneath her, coming undone just as Trixie did whenever she saw her professor.

Katya laid one last kiss onto Trixie’s already bruised neck from the night before and sighed: “I think I’ll be off pretty late tonight, but if you can come over after eight that would be nice.”

“Sure, I’ll just make up some excuse for Kim.” Trixie shrugged and watched Katya as she sauntered away from her. She could look at the thin woman forever, the way she moved was always so graciously thought out. Trixie thought Katya must’ve been an entertainer in a previous life, it seemed amazing that everything she did was so incredibly sexy.

“Okay, I seriously need to run now, but I’ll see you later tonight!” Katya shouted from her hallway, and left no time for Trixie to respond before she heard the door open and close. She was now alone in Katya’s apartment with nothing to do but to snoop around. Trixie got dressed in the same dress she had on the night before and took a quick glance in the full-body mirror Katya had on one of the walls in her bedroom. She looked alright enough, if it wasn’t for the incessive number of hickeys Katya had left on her neck. ‘ _What is she, fifteen?’_ Trixie thought to herself as she examined the bruises.

She decided to get out of the apartment as quickly as possible, given that there might still be time for her to get back into her room before Kim woke up. After locating the hidden key, which was in fact in a jar of sugar, Trixie grabbed her belongings and headed out. She locked the door behind her, and grabbed at the handle to make sure it was locked. As she walked down the hallway whilst looking at her phone, she felt her shoulder tug as she walked into somebody.

“Oh, sorry.” She excused herself automatically, and threw a quick glance at the person she had run into. It was a short woman, her flowery sundress practically screamed that she was from the south. Her red hair was quaffed to perfection, and her pencilled in brow cocked at Trixie. “Don’t mind me darling.” The red-haired woman drawled, her snide response forcing a blush out of Trixie. She gave the woman another apologetic look before she hurried off. She reminded herself to ask Katya later if all her neighbours were that sassy.

 

* * *

 

 

Ginger watched the young woman leave in a hurry, immediately recognizing her from the Facebook profile Justin had shown her. She had practically been forced to violently get the truth from her friend, the only reason he had ultimately told her was if she agreed on not scolding Katya over it. Of course, that was when Katya hadn’t done anything about her crush. Now, judging by the time and the number of hickeys the young girl had tried to disguise with her hair – that was not the case anymore. Ginger went to knock on Katya’s door, but got no response. She picked up her phone instead and dialled the only person she needed to talk to before she tried to get through to Katya.

“Hieee.” Justin greeted her through the line.

“Yeah, listen – I’m at Katya’s place and you won’t believe what I just saw.” Ginger muttered through the phone, hoping that her quiet voice was enough to keep their conversation away from Trixie, if she was still in the building.

“What?” Justin asked, the slow drawl in his voice hastened, as if he already knew what she was going to say.

“I just bumped into that girl, Trixie. It looked like she had stayed the night.” Ginger heard Justin moan in frustration over the phone, she would have done the same if she hadn’t been so worked up. “The girl had more hickeys on her than Jesus had disciples, so somethin’ has definitely been going on.”

“Yeah, no shit.” Justin huffed, prompting Ginger to roll her brown eyes. “Look, I can’t deal with Katya’s shit right now, but we’ll meet up later and talk about this. I don’t think she’s going to be happy when she finds out that I told you.”

“Sure, but she’s going to have more important things to think about when I get to her – see you later, babe.”

“Later.”

 

* * *

 

 

Trixie tried her best to sneak into her room quietly, but her attempts of doing so proved to be in vain as Kim bolted towards her as soon as she got in. “Where have you been all night?” Kim exclaimed, her eyes practically popping out of their sockets.

Trixie tugged her hair closer to the centre of her chest, desperately trying to cover her hickeys. “I’m pretty sure I told you my brother and his fiancée were in town, I went to their hotel yesterday and ended up crashing there.” She lied as she got to her closet, which was conveniently placed next to her bed.

“No, I’m pretty sure you didn’t tell me that.” Kim replied hesitantly as she went to sit on her own bed. “You could’ve called or texted, you know. I was super worried.”

Trixie pulled her dress over her body and hastily threw on another one in pink before she took of her panties. She had no interest in showing Kim her ass, even if she certainly felt like one at the moment. “I’m really sorry; I just lost track of time and before I knew it, it was super late and my brother didn’t want me to leave by myself.” She had no idea if Kim bought her lie or not, but it was all she could hope for as she put a wide choker around her neck. That and the high neckline of her dress ought to be enough to cover up Katya’s throws of passion. Trixie turned around and headed for her desk, where she got started on her makeup. “I’m actually heading back there tonight; my mom and dad are coming so they rented a room with three beds for me. They’re so weird, it’s like if we can’t hang out every minute of the day they think that we’re drifting apart or something.” She continued, a nervous giggle erupting from her throat as she patted on her foundation.

“Oh, I really want to meet them sometime – maybe they could come here before they leave? I don’t want your parents to think their daughter is living with some kind of weirdo.” Kim asked, Trixie peeked over and noticed that the Korean girl had her arms crossed over her chest. If Trixie was a bad liar, then Kim certainly was as well.

“Yeah sure, I’ll ask them.” Trixie quipped as she returned to laying on her face, ignoring Kim for the rest of the morning. She didn’t want to let anything slip, Katya was counting on her ability to keep their blooming relationship a secret and Trixie did not want to disappoint her.

Her study session with Violet went as expected. Her friend had little motivation for the courses that did not interest her, and English happened to be one of them. “I’m serious, I have a burlesque class in an hour and I am so over this – I think I’m just going to wing it, to be honest.” Violet muttered, her long nails clicking over the wooden table they were sitting at, every table in their library looked the same. Trixie thought that every person in there had the same expressions on their faces as well, pure anguish appeared to be a common theme amongst students.

Trixie sighed as she looked down on her laptop, they had barely gotten through half of the phonetic signs Violet needed to learn. “Stop, you’re not going to wing it. Why don’t you tell me what the labiodental sounds are, and where they are produced?” Trixie barely heard a word of what Violet said, as she noticed a familiar blonde figure leaning on one of the bookshelves, a thick book in hand. Trixie peered behind Violet, a smile playing on her lips as Katya looked up and noticed her as well. She seemed nervous, yet she still smirked, furrowing her brows and pointed at her book in jest. Trixie shook her head and returned to Violet, only then noticing that her friend was staring at her. “Hello? I asked you if I was right?” the brunette inquired impatiently.

“Uh, yeah – totally right. You’ll do great.” Trixie replied absentmindedly as she peered behind her friend again and discovered that Katya was gone. “Trixie, what is up with you lately? You are such a spaz.” Violet sighed and returned to her book.

Trixie frowned, not feeling like she deserved the harsh treatment she had received that day. First it was Katya’s weird neighbour looking at her like she was some kind of leper, then Violet had to get in her face too. “I am more than happy to let you study this shit by yourself, bitch.” She snapped, giving Violet a poignant look.

Violet threw her hands up in the air, a surprised look on her otherwise collected face. “Okay, okay don’t get your panties in a bunch. Let’s just go through this one more time before I have to go?”

 

* * *

 

 

The whole day seemed to inch by for Trixie, the thought of maintaining a certain composure when she knew that she was going to see Katya later that night proved to become more and more difficult. When the clock finally struck eight, she got in her best pink wrap dress, puffed her hair up even further and ignored Kim’s looks as she headed out the door. So much had happened in one day that it barely even felt like she had a grip on reality. Katya wanted her to come over and be with her, Trixie knew what was at stake for the evening – they both did. All Trixie wanted to do was to be close to her, to feel Katya’s body underneath her own.

When she got to the apartment, she knocked three times before Katya opened the door to let her in. Whilst Trixie had been expecting more of a warm welcome, Katya’s entire face was red as she screamed at the phone. “You don’t get to tell me what to do! I can’t believe you, honestly.”

Trixie froze in her steps, suddenly feeling very small as she watched Katya shout over the phone. She had never seen Katya mad before, and even though she knew it wasn’t aimed at her, Trixie still felt like she had something to apologize for. Perhaps that’s how it went when you were in love with someone, their problems become your own. She put down her purse onto the floor and walked behind Katya. Trixie tentatively laid a gentle hand on Katya’s waist, hoping to bring her some comfort. Whilst Katya didn’t shrug her off, the only thing Trixie’s helping hand appeared to do was make the older woman even more stiff. “Look, I have to go. We’ll talk about this tomorrow, okay?” Katya seethed before she hung up, sighing as she turned around to face Trixie.

“Are you okay?” Trixie asked gently as she reached up to cup Katya’s chin. “I think Justin somehow knows more about us than he should. He won’t tell me how or why, but I just couldn’t deal with it. I’m tired of feeling so fucking guilty over this, Trixie. _So fucking tired_.” Katya sighed as she reached up and placed her hand on Trixie’s wrist. It did concern her that Katya’s friend seemed to know something about them, but the thing that truly bothered her was how it apparently had turned into such an argument between the two close friends. Trixie didn’t want Katya’s friends to dislike her, yet she realized that if they thought their relationship was fucked up – then there was nothing she could do about it.

“Then don’t feel guilty. Let them say what they want to say.” Trixie comforted her, stepping closer to Katya as she spoke. She wrapped her arms around Katya’s shoulder and leaned in to press an innocent kiss onto her plush lips. Katya sighed into the kiss, her thin arms coming to rest around Trixie’s hips. “Do you really mean that though? It must bother you on some level.” Katya investigated Trixie’s face as she tried to figure out what was going on in her head.

“I mean, I don’t want your friends to dislike me – I’m just more interested in finding out how he even knows about it. The only person I saw this morning as I left was your rude neighbour.” Trixie rambled, not noticing how Katya furrowed her brows.

“Rude neighbour? I’m the only one on my floor, there was a Spanish family in the other flat a couple of weeks ago but they needed to move out because of a water leak. It’s still being fixed, there’s no one there.” Katya informed her, her features concerned as she tried to figure out who could have come to her apartment that early in the morning.

Trixie appeared to think it over, not being able to decipher who she could have seen that morning. Maybe Justin saw her leave the building, who knows. “Let’s not think about that anymore, we’ll deal with it tomorrow.” Trixie changed the subject, tightening the grasp she had around Katya’s shoulders. “Maybe we could think more about us, and what we want to do.” Trixie tried to seduce her, unconscious to the fact that she had the same tone of voice as an underpaid porn star. This did not go by unnoticed by Katya as she was thrown into a fit of wheezing and laughing at the young, and now offended woman in front of her.

Trixie removed her arms with a huff as Katya coughed and wheezed alternately. “I did not know I was this funny until I met you.” She grunted as she crossed her arms over her plump chest. Katya finally managed to get herself together, and wiped tears from her eyes as she tried to stand up straight again. “I’m sorry, I really am. You just… You sound like we need to get out some red lights and a smoke machine.” Katya chuckled as she watched Trixie pout. The latter strutted over to Katya’s couch and threw herself down on it dramatically, thinking that the mood had definitely been ruined by Katya’s fit of laughter.

“Oh, don’t be mad at me любимый, I’m flattered.” Katya continued as she sat down next to Trixie, a hand reaching over to stroke Trixie’s lap. Trixie felt her annoyance gradually float away as Katya continued to stroke her thigh, and the fire in the bottom of her stomach returned. Without thinking too much of what she was supposed to do, Trixie quickly turned to straddle Katya, her dress riding up over her thick thighs as she leaned down to pepper kisses onto Katya’s neck. “Fuck.” She heard Katya murmur as she hastily placed her hands on Trixie’s back and ass. “Are you sure you want to do this? We can wait.” Katya mumbled before she lost any coherent thought she had left.

Trixie, whom felt bolder by the minute, responded by clamping her hands down on her dress and dragging it over and off her body. “I’m sure.” She whispered before she grabbed Katya’s hands and placed them on her breasts whilst leaning down to capture her lips. They kissed furiously, all the tensions from the day were pushed further back in their minds as they grabbed onto whatever body part they could in their quest to get closer to each other.

When they had both managed to come down from their high, Trixie and Katya laid naked on Katya’s couch, both women panting quietly next to each other. “That was… Wow.” Trixie panted, not knowing exactly what to say that would be enough to describe what had just happened. She had imagined being with Katya for so long, but reality trumped whatever fantasy she had concocted in her mind.

Katya slung a sweaty arm over Trixie’s waist, giggling as she looked at her naked body. “My poor couch has been through _a lot_ tonight.” She commented as she leaned forward to place a sloppy kiss on Trixie’s lips. Their lipsticks were smudged once more; Katya could spot more of her own red lipstick on Trixie’s mouth than what the young woman had of her own. Trixie giggled at what she said and buried her head in Katya’s neck. The whole situation was rather absurd, really. They had gone from denying their feelings to sleeping with each other in the span of a week, an unexpected yet welcomed transition. Trixie couldn’t believe how lucky she was as she watched Katya’s lean and sweaty body next to her own. There was so much she still wanted to discover about Katya, what they could do and when they could do it. Even if they had just finished a long session of wild and unfiltered intimacy, Trixie was impatient to do it again. She still had the sensation of needing to be as close to Katya as she could – as if the older woman would be torn away from her.

If she was being selfish, then she didn’t care anymore. All that mattered was the way Katya placed her cold fingers on Trixie’s side, and how she placed soft kisses onto her head. There couldn’t be anything wrong with that? No matter how long Trixie would be able to hold onto to Katya would be worth her time and efforts. “You’re not going to leave me, are you?” Trixie whispered from the crook of Katya’s neck. Katya frowned at Trixie’s words. Her heart felt heavy as she realized Trixie still had doubts about what was going to happen between the two of them. The young woman hardly ever let on to her own fragility, a hard shell concealed her doubts and fears. Yet Katya knew she was terrified, she knew because she was equally as scared. Perhaps for different reasons, but it was still there.

“Hey.” Katya said, moving her shoulder lightly so Trixie would look up at her. Once she made eye contact with the younger woman, she continued: “I’m not going anywhere. I don’t think it’s physically possible for me to stay away from you anymore. Not unless you want me to.”

“Then, never. Never stay away from me.”

“I won’t. I promise.”

 

 

 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey babes! It's been a while, hasn't it? I've been super busy (still am), so this fic has been suffering the consequences of that. I've been stressin' to get this out, and haven't really proof read it all that much, so there might be some typos lurking. Sorry. The next chapter might take me a while, but don't give up on our crazy lovebirds!!  
> As always, much love to you all and your kind comments and happy readings my doves!

Katya hadn’t considered all the ways her life could go right, that was until she met Trixie. The past few weeks had been amazing; Trixie had been over nearly every night and Katya had managed to dodge all questions about her budding new relationship from her suspicious friends. Justin and Ginger weren’t happy with her, she knew that, but every time Trixie looked at her meant another moment where Katya added her friends to her ‘don’t care’-list.

“Maybe I should meet them? Make them see I’m not some sort of grade gold digger?” Trixie inquired as they ate breakfast at Katya’s kitchen table. Katya watched as her lover fiddled with her coffee cup, she seemed obviously nervous to what she would reply. Katya was hesitant in introducing Trixie properly to her friends. It wasn’t that she was ashamed of Trixie, but she knew how her friends could be. They did not approve, and Katya did not want Trixie to feel bad in any way.

“Does it really matter what they think? You and I both know what we are.” Katya replied, trying her best to avoid the question in its entirety. She looked down from Trixie’s piercing stare, placing her focus on the oatmeal she had prepared for them instead. Admittedly, she should be happy that Trixie wanted to try and make things work with her friends, but the mere thought of it shook Katya to her core. She hadn’t introduced any woman she had dated to her friends in a long time, and she knew they didn’t approve of her and Trixie’s relationship to begin with. Katya was more concerned with making sure that Trixie’s feelings weren’t hurt, and she just wasn’t sure if she could ensure that.

Trixie appeared to be contemplating what Katya had said, mindlessly picking at her toast before she replied; “I get what you’re saying, this is just really important to me – can you understand that?” in any other situation, what Trixie said would probably have come off as catty, but her usual bitchiness seemed to be lost with Katya. It wasn’t that she couldn’t be herself, but just being around the older woman had awakened some sort of humility in her that she hadn’t experienced in a long time.

Katya stared Trixie down, trying to make out any form of hesitation in the young blonde before she finally sighed and offered her a small smile; “If it’s that important to you, then I’ll talk to them.”

 

* * *

 

 

When it was all said and done, Katya had finally managed to book a dinner with Ginger and Justin at her apartment. In any other situation, she would have liked to take Trixie out to dinner somewhere; but she couldn’t forget about their situation. She knew Ginger and Justin certainly wouldn’t. Katya moaned in despair as she zipped around her apartment, trying to get her black wrap dress on as she peeked into the giant pot on her stove. Katya had tried her very best to find a suitable vegetarian dish that would still be tasty enough to settle the stomachs of everyone around the table that wasn’t Trixie. She had eventually ended up with a borscht, and fresh baguettes with a side of different cold mixes. The soup smelt good enough, so Katya decided to let it putter away some more before her guests arrived.

As she had finally finished putting on her dress, she picked up her phone and was immediately met by several frantic messages from Trixie:

**Pink wonder:** _What should I wear?? I don’t want to be too dressy._

**Pink wonder:** _Babe, why aren’t you answering???_

**Pink wonder:** _KATYA! I will seriously kill you!_

Katya snorted to herself as she read, Trixie apparently had no temper left to deal with her absence. She walked into her dining room as she typed, throwing one last glance at her messy table setting before she finally replied:

**Blonde Russian:** _I’m sure you can find some shade of pink you haven’t explored yet, sweet. When will you get here?_

**Pink wonder:** _Fuck off Katya. I’ll be there in fifteen._

Trixie sighed in frustration as she threw her phone onto her bed and proceeded to rummage through her closet. Kim had fortunately left her alone for the evening, opting to spend the evening at her new friend’s house, a girl named Naomi. Trixie hadn’t met the long-legged girl in person, just by pictures, but she knew she owed Kim some serious girl time soon enough. Her ‘parents in town’ excuse had only gotten her so far; her friends had begun to suspect something that Trixie found difficult to talk herself out of. She had run out of excuses she could tell Kim before she went to spend the night at Katya’s, so she had simply told her that she had met someone – who that someone was would be left to the imagination.

Finally, Trixie tugged on a tight, white dress. She accentuated her waist by adding a broad, golden belt to it. If she looked slightly classier than she usually would – that was good enough for her. She tugged on her coat and rushed out the door whilst silently praying to herself that she wasn’t heading to her own doom.

She knocked on that familiar door and tried to calm down her heaving chest as she waited for Katya to open the door. She hadn’t been nervous about being at Katya’s for a while now, having returned to that bothered her. Being with Katya had never been easy, but she couldn’t think of a time where she would have rather run home to her dorm instead of seeing her beautiful partner. They hadn’t really decided on what they were, but whenever Trixie pictured Katya there were typically flowers, beaches and glitter that floated around in her mind. Thoughts of her calmed Trixie down enough so she could plaster on a smile as she heard someone rustling behind the door.

To her surprise, Katya was not the one to open the door. Instead, Justin stood there. He had a pair of black chinos on, a ripped band t-shirt draped over his thin chest and a nervous look adorned on his face. “Hiee.” He squeaked half-heartedly as Trixie’s smile fell from her cheeks. “Oh, hi!” she immediately replied, nervously giggling as she stepped inside. ‘ _Fuck, Trixie – get it together!’_  she thought to herself as she took off her coat and tossed it onto Katya’s infamous coat pile she had in one corner of her hallway.

Before she had any time to say anything else, Katya rushed into the hallway and instantaneously wrapped an arm around Trixie’s waist. “Hi, sweet.” Katya greeted Trixie, her blue eyes darting over to Justin as she spoke.

Trixie smiled at her nervously as they headed towards Katya’s dining room. Ginger was already sat there, a slightly judgemental look in her narrow eyes as she examined Trixie up and down. Trixie realized, as she sat down opposite from Ginger and next to Katya, that the woman she had bumped into a few days ago had been none other than Katya’s friend. ‘ _Figures.’_ She thought to herself as she looked over at Katya for strength. Her partner, however, was busy serving them all soup. Trixie sighed internally before she looked back at Ginger, an overly friendly face now permanently etched onto her features. “I’m Trixie, I think I was the one that bumped into you a few days ago.” She extended her hand over the table towards Ginger and was relieved when Ginger shook it.

“Yes, darling, that would be me. I’m Ginger, but I’m sure you already knew that.” Ginger greeted her, a smirk playing on her thin lips. Trixie chuckled nervously as Katya placed a bowl of soup in front of her, the purple liquid spilling over the edges as it was slumped down onto the table. “This looks great, Kat.” Trixie thanked her as she picked up her spoon and mindlessly stirred it in her soup. She felt multiple pairs of eyes on her as she looked down on her bowl, which was something she had taken into consideration as she had nagged Katya earlier on – although at that precise moment, she definitely regretted her choices.

“So, should we get to the part that I think we’re all sort of dreading?” Justin drawled, prompting Trixie to glance up at him. She felt a hand on her thigh, a comforting squeeze from Katya that gave her enough confidence to sit up straight in her seat. It all seemed surreal to her. She looked to her left and saw Katya’s nervous features as she glanced between her friends’ and Trixie.

“I think that’s fair, I did drag the both of you here even though I know Ginger had a hot date with her slot machine.” Katya teased as she removed her hand from Trixie’s thigh to grab her glass of red wine. Ginger, in turn, rolled her eyes at her friend and then sighed. “For the life of me, why you would risk your education for this idiot is beyond me.” She snapped as she gave Trixie a poignant look. Ginger’s brutal honesty surprised her, Trixie wasn’t sure whether she ought to laugh or cry. Her wide eyes must have given her away, as the older southern woman gave a gruff laugh as she downed three more mouthfuls or her soup.

“Don’t give her such a hard time, the both of you stuck around me. My womanly charm is undeniable.” Katya retorted as she took another hearty gulp of her wine and glanced over at the still awestruck Trixie. “Her growl is worse than her bite, Trixie.” Katya tried to comfort her, a nervous giggle escaping Trixie’s pink lips.

“Yeah, don’t get scared now – I’m just an over-weight, asthmatic, chain smoking, little lady from Orlando, Florida. Nothing to worry about, as long as you can make me understand why on God’s green earth you would put yourself in this situation. That goes for the both of you.” Ginger stated as she pointed her finger at both Trixie and Katya.

Justin kept silent as he watched the exchange of words between his friends’ and Trixie. As she glanced over at him, he looked down on his food again. Trixie knew she would have to explain this eventually, she wanted the world to know just how much she cared for Katya, but having to say it in a way that would convince Katya’s friends of her intentions whilst still seeming genuine proved harder than she could have guessed. “I- I know it doesn’t really make sense. I think both of us wanted it to go away, at some point. I’m not after anything she owns, the only thing I want is her. That’s why we’re in this mess.” Trixie replied, hoping her words came across as she wanted them to. The candles on Katya’s dining room table flickered as the night grew closer on them, the darker setting seemingly making their conversation even more serious.

“I never intended for this to happen, I know my past makes that hard for you to understand but please know that the only thing I want is for her to be happy. I’m happy just by being close to her, so…” Katya chimed in. Trixie furrowed her brows at what she said and turned her gaze towards the other woman. Her curly hair was tucked behind her ear, the words she spoke even more riddled with her Russian accent – something Trixie had learnt as a sign she was either stressed or nervous. Having no idea of what Katya was talking about made her nervous in turn, what could it be that she didn’t know? Katya told her everything, from where she was born to her past afflictions with drugs. Katya had had a messy life, that had never been something she had wanted to hide from Trixie, or so she had thought.

“What are you- “Trixie started, but was interrupted by Ginger. “Yes, but I just don’t know what will come of this, I’m sure you’re a very nice girl Trixie – but you’re way too young to be making such a mess of things. I know you probably don’t give a shit about what I think, but I just want to make sure that I’m being clear here, I don’t think this will work.”

Ginger’s words hurt Trixie, but the thing she was struck by was how she was still being treated as a petulant child. Katya just sat by silently as her friend ripped into Trixie, whilst insulting their relationship. Trixie felt a flare of irritation run through her entire core, one that could not be stifled. “I’m not a kid, though. And even though Katya’s currently being more quiet than I ever think I’ve seen her – I _can_ speak for the both of us. It’s not like we don’t have a plan, next year she won’t even be my teacher and then no one can do shit about what we have.” Trixie ranted as she clenched her fist. She only stopped when she saw the amused look on Ginger’s face, and heard a stifled chuckle from Katya. “What are _you_ laughing about?!” Trixie whipped her head to stare Katya down, her grumble only resulting in a chuckle from both Ginger and Katya.

“Hey, I’m on your side here Tracy – don’t be mad at me!” Katya threw her arms up in surrender, unable to contain her wheezing laughter as it erupted from her throat. The use of Katya’s ill-fitted nickname for her certainly did not help the situation, Trixie could feel her cheeks grow warm and red from irritation she realized the flare was probably strong enough so that not even her thick layers of make-up could contain it. “Really? You’re going to start with the Tracy-shit now?”

“I’m sorry Tamika.”

“Katya, I swear to God…” Trixie warned the Russian woman, lightning shooting out of her eyes as she stared her down. It was only when she heard a grumble coming from Justin’s direction that she looked away, surprised to hear his voice as he had stayed silent throughout their entire discussion. “If you want to stay with her, then she needs to know everything.” Justin said, a sense of gloom in his voice. His words seemed to put Katya at a loss for words, Trixie had only seen that exasperated look on her face when they had been fighting. Never like this.

“What is it?” Trixie asked, her eyes darting between Katya and Justin. Even Ginger seemed uncomfortable, her small frame fidgeting in her seat as she looked pleadingly towards Justin. “Maybe now isn’t the best time…” Ginger tried, but was silenced as Katya interrupted her.

“I was planning on telling her, it’s just a conversation we need to have in private. Private doesn’t include you.” Katya seethed. “Well, then we’re leaving. I don’t know if there’s any point in having this conversation before she knows everything.” Justin pressed the matter, making Trixie even more worried than she thought she could ever be. She peered over at Katya, whom clenched her fist again and nodded as her friends stood up and headed towards the hallway. Trixie wasn’t sure what was going on, she stood up and stared out to the hallway in disbelief, Katya’s open complex apartment suddenly playing in her favour as she got a chance to seek some sort of clues for what Katya was going to say in Ginger or Justin’s eyes. They simply gave her an apologetic look before Ginger sighed and said: “I’m sorry we had to put a cap on this darling, but I think this was a conversation the both of you needed to have before we came here.”

 

* * *

 

 

As they left, Trixie whirled around to stare at her partner – she needed answers and she needed them right away. “What the hell was that?” she seethed as Katya tidied up the table. “That must’ve been the most dramatic exit I’ve ever seen, which makes me think that they were telling the truth, Kat. You need to tell me.” She continued as she followed Katya into the kitchen. The curly haired blonde slumped their half-empty bowls into her sink and then turned around to face Trixie, her thin body leaning against her cupboard.

“Before I tell you, I want you to know that what we have is unique. It’s nothing I compare to anything else, and even though this definitely isn’t the right time to say this, I think I’m falling in love with you. You need to know that, Trixie.” Katya stated earnestly, her blue eyes sad.

Hearing Katya’s words made butterflies come to life in Trixie’s stomach, but the expression on her face shot them down, until an uncomfortable clump formed in their place. “What is it?” she whispered, heading towards Katya until she could reach her arms up to rub Katya’s shoulders in order to comfort her. Whatever it was, it couldn’t be that bad.

Katya looked up into her eyes, a sniffle escaping her usually tough exterior as she whispered: “This has happened to me before. Although, in reverse – I dated my professor for several years. Justin and Ginger have been concerned that I’m trying to project that relationship onto you, because she left me and I… I had a tough time with it. That’s when the drugs started.”

Trixie’s arms slumped down to her sides as her mouth gaped open. She must look comical, but there was nothing funny about what Katya had said. She had no idea what to say. It would be unfair to judge Katya for what had happened, but the hurt crossing her heart told her differently. Katya had deliberately kept this from her, she had known this was a factor before she dated Trixie – but that didn’t matter, the only thing that mattered was the fact that Trixie had spent several nights telling Katya about her life, and asking her about her life back in Russia and beyond. Katya hadn’t told her, and Trixie had looked stupid in front of her friends. Katya had made her look stupid, yet again. “When were you planning on telling me?” Trixie muttered, her arms now crossing over her chest in attempt to protect herself.

“I just wanted to find a way to do it in my own time. I know this sounds bad, and Justin had no right to say that, but – “Katya started, only stopping when Trixie rolled her eyes and pursed her lips.

“So therefore you didn’t want me to meet them? You know that this isn’t his fault, I get why they were uncomfortable if they knew that you had kept this from me.” Trixie ranted, stepping away as Katya took one tentative step towards her. “Katya, do not touch me right now!” she warned, a small pang of guilt flashing through her as Katya’s face completely fell and she stepped back.

“I don’t think you meant to fall for me, especially not after that. I’m just hurt that you waited so long to tell me that it had to boil down to this.” Trixie softened, feeling her heart tug as she watched a lone tear trickle down Katya’s pale cheek. She wanted to wipe it away, to wrap Katya up in her arms and never let her go, but she was unable to do so. If there was anything Trixie Mattel had feared throughout her life, it was losing her face. She felt humiliated to a point where she was emotionally unable to care about anyone other than herself.

“I know, I’m sorry. That just feels like such a long time ago, but I still think about it at times – things got bad, I thought it would be too horrible to do the same thing to you. If that makes sense.” Katya explained, her eyes still peering down at the floor.

Trixie had no idea what to say, but she knew that she needed some time to herself. She stepped towards Katya and pulled her into a deep embrace, shivers travelling down her spine as she felt a relieved sigh in the crook of her neck. “I’m going to go home, and I will tell Kim about this. I know you don’t want any of my friends to know, but I need to talk about this with her and you and I will talk more tomorrow, okay?” she mumbled into Katya’s ear, and then pressed a quick kiss to Katya’s temple as she felt the older woman nod.

She left feeling empty, their relationship had never been easy and the night had been full of unwelcomed surprises. For the first time, Trixie began to question whether it was worth it, in her experience or lack thereof, love wasn’t supposed to be this hard.

 


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! It's been a while, I'm very glad to see that you're still here and commenting. Work and life has been kicking my ass lately, and this fic has definitely suffered the consequences of that. Thank you for your continued support, be prepared for some more angst in this already angst-ridden story. Also haven't really proof read this too much, so if there's a lot of spelling/grammar errors then that's why, haha.

This hadn’t been what Trixie was expecting. It seemed like whatever she and Katya did, there was always some obstacle between them. They had managed to stay out of trouble for a couple of weeks, that was it. In her defence, Katya not telling her about her previous relationship was on her – not Trixie. All she knew was that she was permanently sick of having to worry about what would happen. What she needed was advice, some truths’ that didn’t come from Katya’s mouth because God knows that she was biased in that regard.

As she returned to her room, she was fortunate enough to see Kim perched on her bed, mindlessly staring at their small television. “What’s up?” Kim asked distantly, not tearing her gaze from the show she was watching. “Uh, so remember that I told you I was seeing someone?” Trixie asked as she hung her coat on their hallway hangers.

“Yeah?”

“Turns out that you were right. It’s, uh, not really working out.” Trixie had no idea what Kim would say. If anything, she knew that she had been wrong to lie, Kim must know who she was talking about. Judging by the pointed look Kim gave her, she was aware of what was happening in her friend’s life.

“Yeah, no shit.” Kim lisped, sitting up on the bed with a sigh. Trixie sat down opposite from her on her own bed, a blush now present on her cheeks. “You knew, huh?” she asked, knowing what the probable answer was. “You’re not the sneaky little minx you think you are.” Kim chuckled, her lisp ever present as she crossed one of her thick legs over the other. “But why is it this time? Katya’s age or your non-existent age?”

Trixie had started to realize that the drama that had been present in her relationship since day one, and she wasn’t the only one it was taking a toll on. If anything, her falling for Katya had been problematic at best. But was she certain that she could really give her up? Even the thought of it disturbed her, she almost got angry to the point where it felt like someone else was telling her it wasn’t working. “She’s been in this situation before, with her own professor. We had dinner with her friends and Justin – the guy that was with her when we we’re at the movies’ – wasn’t having it. “

Trixie stopped to catch her breath, eyes widening as she took in a deep breath before continuing her rant: “So, in a way I guess he had decided to be my knight in shining armour. I’m not fighting with Katya, I’m just… Sick of this. It’s so much drama at once, even I can’t keep up.”

Kim seemed to be taking her rant in fully before answering, her eyes narrowing as she thought about Trixie’s words. “I mean… You’re not wrong. If you really love her, then that’s one thing but you need to be really sure. If things are going to continue being messy and hard, it will be for nothing if you are still doubting your relationship.” Kim had a tendency to surprise Trixie with her spurs of wisdom, this time was no different. She needed to be sure of her relationship with Katya, and she felt like deep down, she was. What continued to bug her was the fact that it never seemed to stop. Trixie wouldn’t stand there like a fool when it didn’t work out because Katya got sick of it, and she would still be clinging on to memories of happier times.

“I am sure that I am in love with her. I wouldn’t have risked everything for her otherwise, and I certainly wouldn’t have slept with her. This has just escalated from me flirting with my teacher to something else entirely.” Trixie explained, her words having barely left her pink lips before she heard their door open and slam shut. Her entire body pulsed with a heightened pulse as she looked towards their entrance.

Violet stood there, a surprised look on her harsh features. “What teacher are you screwing? I knew you weren’t so innocent Trix’.” The brunette joked as she slung her bag onto their floor and sat down on the chair near Trixie’s desk. Silence fell over the room as Trixie blushed furiously. She had promised Katya that she would keep the details between them private, but had informed her that she needed to talk with Kim about it – Violet wasn’t part of that deal. As she glanced at her glamorous friend, she realized that there was no point in lying. Violet was her friend, and that meant that Trixie couldn’t lie to her anymore.

“It’s Katya Zamolodchikova. She’s… Yeah.” Trixie replied hesitantly as she looked back down on her lap. She could hear a huff of air escape Violet’s mouth, the surprise in her posture evident as Trixie looked back at her. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, it’s just… We wanted to keep it private, for obvious reasons.”

Violet watched her as she spoke, a smile spreading across her lips that didn’t quite meet her eyes. “Oh, bitch, I could have guessed it was something like that. No wonder you were brown-nosing her so much.” Violet laughed as she stood up again. Trixie frowned at her words, knowing Violet she tended to joke rather harshly, so there was no real point in reprimanding her. The thin girl stood up and grabbed her bag again, scanning across Trixie’s desk before she grabbed a book from it, stuffing it in her bag. “Now, you must give me every dirty detail later, I just wanted to grab the course book for Mr. Flint’s class really quick before meeting up with Pearl.”

“Oh, okay – yeah, we’ll talk later I guess.” Trixie answered, taken back with Violet’s dismissive manner. Neither she nor Kim had a chance to say anything else before Violet blew them a kiss and left their dorm room. A nagging feeling in the back of Trixie’s head told her that something was wrong, she just wasn’t entirely sure of what it was.

 

* * *

 

 

Violet shut the door behind her, a deep breath being drawn from her plump lips. Irritation flowed through her as she stomped through the hallway of Trixie and Kim’s building. Of course, Trixie was fucking Katya Zamolodchikova – the woman who had made Violet’s average sink faster than a rock in the ocean.

Katya had never liked her. Violet knew that she would have had a better grade if she hadn’t been assigned Ms. Zamo as a teacher. She had grown to dislike the blonde woman with all the will she had, something that had happened to Violet before. Deep down, she knew that she had a hot temper and not the best rap sheet with her teachers, but there was something about this that really bothered her.

Trixie was supposed to work as hard as the rest of them, how could Violet be sure that she wasn’t getting any leniency for the fact that she had her head between their professor’s thighs after hours? ‘ _Nothing I’ve seen of her work has been that amazing, I knew Trixie was ambitious but this is taking it to an entirely different level.’_ The thought of Trixie as a gold digger, or grade digger, made her feel slightly guilty – however, not guilty enough that she kept from spilling the details of what she had just gotten to know to Pearl.

Pearl’s usually tired eyes widened as she stirred in her iced coffee with her straw, their usually light hearted coffee dates at the local on-campus Starbucks disturbed by not only the seriousness of the situation, but the anger in Violet’s voice as she told Pearl about what had happened. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone get so _desperate_ to keep their grades up, although I shouldn’t be so surprised because we all know that the only reason Trixie is even here is because she got that internship with her dad.” Violet snared as she stirred some sweetener into her latte.

“Don’t say that, we don’t really know what’s going on. Trixie is probably having a hard time with this too.” Pearl warned her friend, taking a sip of her sweet drink as she watched Violet cautiously.

“Yeah, it must be tough getting fucked whilst getting good grades and a freshman T.A position. Really _fucking_ hard.” Violet muttered as she clapped her heeled foot against the cobblestone. She knew that she shouldn’t be speaking about this out in the open like this, but at that moment, she couldn’t care less. “Maybe I should offer Katya a hand job as well, with my skills I would become Valedictorian in no time.”

Pearl huffed at her words, a chuckle escaping her collected posture. “You better not, bitch. I’d like to keep your hands to myself.” Violet lightened up at the mention of the recent developments in their relationship. “I’m sorry for bringing that up, babe – I’m just angry.” She apologized, there was no point in annoying Pearl as much as Trixie had done to her.

Pearl smirked at her as she picked up a cigarette from her purse and set it between her lips. After she had lit it, she took a deep drag and winked at Violet. “No worries, hon. I get that you’re annoyed, but Katya’s the one that’s going to have to take the heat when this goes down in flames. If you really think about it, she’s totally taking advantage of Trixie.”

An idea flickered into Violet’s mind, a mental lightbulb blinking as her features softened into a grin. “You’re absolutely right, Pearlie. Absolutely fucking right. Trixie _is_ being taken advantage of – what kind of teacher would put a student through all that?”

Pearl stared at her as she took another drag of her cigarette. Her eyes narrowed suspiciously as she gazed at her friend. “Yeah? What are you saying?”

“What I’m saying, is that someone should help her. I can help her fix this, and she’ll thank me afterwards.” Violet excitedly chirped, and downed the rest of her coffee. Pearl tossed the rest of her cigarette bud onto the ground and stomped on it before she looked back at Violet, a sigh escaping her. “Please don’t do anything stupid, Vi. It’s not worth it.”

“Don’t worry, I won’t.”

 

* * *

 

 

“Ms. Chachki, the headmaster will see you now.” The secretary named Robbie told her, a kind smile adorning her face as Violet thanked her and stood up. As soon as she had entered headmaster Kindle’s office, something within her went cold. Was this right? Judging by the look on her face, their stern headmaster frowned as he saw her. “Are you alright? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“I’m fine, Mr. Kindle. It’s just… I’m sort of second guessing the reason I’m here.” Violet replied shakily as she sat down in the wooden chair on the opposite side of her headmaster’s desk. “Well, if something is wrong – reporting it is always the right thing to do, Ms. Chachki.” Kindle replied, a tired huff coming from him as he tore his gaze away from his computer to get a good look at the girl.

Violet decided for herself that it was too late to back out now, but her rehearsed approach suddenly seemed way too harsh. She needed to soften the blow. “I… Think my friend is being taken advantage of, by a – by a member of the faculty.” She mumbled, noticing the way her headmaster flinched as she mentioned that his staff was involved in it.

“What are you talking about? Being taken advantage of how?” He asked, the pen in his hand twitching as he tapped it onto the desk. Violet guessed he wanted to know if someone was going to sue the college, and how much it was going to cost him.

“They have been intimate, or – I mean in a relationship, sort of. I just don’t want my friend to get into trouble, because I don’t think she did any of this to try and get better grades or something, she’s just twenty years old.” Violet rambled, the reality of what she was about to do dawning on her.

“What student is this regarding?” Kindle asked as he took speedy notes on a sheet of paper that happened to be in front of him.

“Trixie Mattel.” The words burned like ash in Violet’s mouth, a foul taste forming on her taste buds.

“And what staff-member?”

…

“Katya Zamolodchikova.”

 

Mr. Kindle’s face fell as he heard Katya’s name leave Violet’s lips. She knew that Katya was a valued member of staff, but she also suspected that the fact that the art teacher had been an issue before. No teacher that was the way that Katya was could just go on in her career without making a few enemies. Maybe Mr. Kindle was one of those people, as long as he left Trixie alone – that was enough for Violet. “I want to make sure that you won’t punish Trixie for this, she is a good student and…” Violet started, but stopped as her headmaster raised his right hand to quiet her down.

“You did right by bringing this to my attention, Ms. Chachki. I will make sure that Trixie doesn’t suffer for this, but if these allegations are true then there will need to be consequences. For now, you are dismissed.”

As she left his office, Violet felt like throwing up. What had she done? Had she just cost Katya her job, and in extension, Trixie’s happiness? She shouldn’t have done that, she _really_ shouldn’t have done that. Violet picked her phone up with shaky hands and dialled the number to the only person that would understand her.

A few rings went by before the person answered the phone. “Hello?” Pearl asked tiredly, Violet had probably interrupted her in her regular five ‘clock nap. “Pearl? I think I just fucked up majorly.” Violet whispered as she walked down the campus, heading straight towards Pearl’s dorm.

“What have you done?” Pearl asked, though her worried tone suggested that she already knew.

“I just fucked everything up.”

 

* * *

 

 

Trixie had spent the remainder of the evening in the shower room, a deep rinse and a good facial seemed like something that would definitely cheer her up. She had written Katya a long text that said they needed to talk, but that she loved her and they would figure everything out. After her talk with Kim, she felt like everything might still work out in the end. She still loved Katya, all they needed was time and patience. Patience being the operative word.

As she slipped on her fluffy, pink bathrobe, she strutted back into her dorm room and found that Kim had left – probably having retreated to Naomi for the evening. Just as she set down her shower caddy onto her desk, her phone started to ring. She ignored it, letting it ring as she tossed her towel onto her chair and hastily grabbed her caddy as the water still left in it was seeping dangerously close to her computer. After having wiped it down and the rings had stopped, her phone suddenly rang again.

Trixie furrowed her brows and sighed as she shuffled over to her bed and grabbed it from where it was vibrating. “Hello?” she greeted whoever her eager caller was, whilst still drying her legs with her robe. A sniffle was heard through the phone, causing Trixie to plump down on her bed. She would have recognized that cry from a crowd full of people. “Katya, what’s wrong?” she asked, worry in her voice.

“Trixie, what have you done?” Katya whispered into the phone, a blowing noise through the phone suggesting that she was smoking as they spoke. In any other situation, Trixie would have reprimanded her girlfriend for smoking, but now was not the time. “What? What have I done?” Trixie asked anxiously, tears beginning to well up in her big eyes.

“I’ve been called to a disciplinary hearing over, what did he call it – immoral conduct with a student.” Katya cried into the phone, her usually cheery tone completely gone. Trixie fell into a trance, thoughts whirling around in her head. She had been so careful. There was no chance that anyone could have overheard her, there was just no way. “Trixie, please say something – I think you owe me that.” Katya continued, her voice restrained, like all she wanted to do was scream and shout at the younger woman.

“I-I didn’t tell anyone – I just told Kim and Violet. Nobody else, what are we going to do?” Trixie was full crying at this point, heavy tears dropping down on her already wet cheeks. The door opened and shut, she heard Kim and Naomi mumble something to her, but she ignored them. “It has to be okay, they don’t have any proof.” Trixie continued, and heard the door close once more, suggesting that Naomi had found it appropriate to leave Kim and Trixie alone for the time being.

“Someone went into Kindle’s office and told him everything about you and me, only that I have been taking advantage of you for the promise of a better grade. I’ve been suspended from setting foot on campus until the hearing next week.” Katya muttered into the phone, Trixie could hear her taking another deep drag of her cigarette.

“Katya, I’m so sorry. I will tell him it’s a lie, that not one part of it is true; I promise that I’m going to fix this.”

“It’s no point, Trixie. We were stupid to think that this could work, I set us up for this when I agreed to be with you. Don’t apologize, it’s not your fault.” Katya earnestly replied, it didn’t surprise Trixie one bit that after all of this Katya still had her back. But what did it mean? Were they done?

“I love you.” Trixie whispered. “I’ll come to yours right away, let me just get dressed.”

Katya took a while before replying, seemingly tired as she stated: “I think I need to be left alone right now, it might not be the best idea for us to see each other before the hearing. If I want to keep my job I need to stay out of… This, for a while.”

Trixie understood what she meant, it was the least Trixie could do for her at this point. “I understand, just don’t shut me out entirely. Let me be there for you in any way you need me to.”

Katya whispered a quick; ‘Thank you’ before hanging up, leaving Trixie on her bed. She started hyper ventilating, her hands shaking as tears streamed down her cheeks. She was sad, mad, worried, hurt – yet all of those feelings felt small in comparison to the turmoil going on inside of her. Hands spread across her thighs, a chin setting down on her as well as she saw Kim in front of her. “What happened?” she asked, the sadness in her eyes perfectly reflected into what Trixie imagined she looked like whenever she comforted her friends’. The sadness that was genuine, yet not enough. Trixie found herself being jealous of Kim, she would rather be in anyone else’s shoes than her own.

“Someone told headmaster Kindle about me and Katya. She had a disciplinary hearing next week and she is heartbroken. I caused this Kim, one of our neighbours must have overheard us. I can’t…”

“What? No, you know that our neighbours are the loudest fuckers alive and we still don’t hear them – they didn’t overhear. Who did you tell besides me and Violet?” Kim asked exasperatedly and sat up straight onto the floor.

Violet. Kim and Violet. Violet had been weird about it when Trixie had told her, yet blaming her friend was enough to make her cry even more. Until she didn’t, and just knew that the nagging feeling in the back of her head had been right. It had to have been Violet, there was no other option. “She has always hated Katya, of course she would pull some shit like this.” Trixie growled, clenching her fists in her lap.

She could hear Kim stand up, scurrying over to get something. “I’m calling her right now.” She informed Trixie as she called. “Violet? Yeah, Katya just called Trixie…” Kim started, and then stopped to listen to the muted voice that was coming from the phone. Trixie looked up at her as her friend slumped down onto her bed. “You did what?! Are you fucking crazy?” Kim exclaimed, her voice more upset then Trixie had ever heard her be.

It was enough for her, she didn’t need to hear anything else. Trixie stood up abruptly and went over to her closet, tearing out a pair of joggers, throwing them on and then angrily tugged a ‘Boston University, Home of the Boston Terriers’” Sweatshirt over her head. She was out for blood, this was enough.

Trixie didn’t listen when Kim called out for her, she just grabbed her phone and flip flops before thundering out of their room, anger driving her forward as she heard Kim scuffle behind her. She would get justice for this.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, disclaimer: I have no idea if this is really how these things work in the US as I only have experience from my own uni so I'm drawing from that. Just imagine that this makes total sense if it doesn't. Thank you for your comments and kudos, and I will definitely try to keep the updates a bit more regular for you guys.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm ba-ba-ba-ba-back again! There is A LOT going on in this chapter, so it will definitely take you for a spin. All I can say is read the notes at the end as well, I adoooooore you for your continued support in the making of this fic and I have enjoyed every minute of it. Happy readings my doves!

”Trixie, maybe you should chill out for a second?”

  
Trixie could barely hear her friend through her blind rage. Violet had just cost her everything, everything that she and Katya had worked so hard for – and for what? Once she had reached Violet’s dorm, she had set straight for her door, her clenched fist banging over her, now, former friend. Kim stood behind her, nervously fidgeting beside her enraged friend. Trixie was out for blood, enough so that she wouldn’t even consider calming down.

  
She could hear some shuffling behind the door, Violet must have been understandably hesitant to let her in. As the door opened, Trixie expected to start shouting right away, but was cut off when Pearl opened the door. The blonde, whom was usually so non-expressive had a solemn look on her face. “Trix…” she greeted her, a silent apology apparent on her features.

  
“Where is she?” Trixie gritted, her arms crossing over her chest.

  
“She’s really sorry, I know she acted like a piece of shit and you need to know that she is aware of that.” Pearl stated calmly whilst peeking back over her shoulder. Trixie barely took in a word she was saying as she heard someone sniffle from inside. She looked back at Pearl, a cold expression on her usually cheerful features. “I don’t really care what she thinks she knows, Pearl. Now move.”

  
Pearl knew better than to stop Trixie, so she just moved to the side, her arms up in a surrendering motion. Trixie and Kim strode past her, immediately met by Violet, whom was sitting on Pearl’s bed. Her legs were drawn up towards her face, her long arms draped over her legs as if she was trying to protect herself. “Trixie, I’m so sorry.” She mumbled from where she had hidden her face in her lap.

  
Trixie felt like heading over there and slapping the living daylights out of her. She could feel her phone vibrating in the pocket of her sweatpants, and for a brief second she wondered if it was Katya. However, it probably wasn’t, because Katya wanted nothing to do with her anymore. Violet had made sure of that. “Violet, why did you do that?” Kim sighed from where she was standing beside the now shaking Trixie. Violet set down her legs and stood up, still not daring to look Trixie in the eyes.

  
“I don’t know what I was thinking, I just got so angry. You know I’ve had such a hard time even being able to like, pass her class – I thought she was just taking advantage of Trixie.” Violet meekly explained herself. Trixie had been staring down at her feet, but at the mention of Katya ‘taking advantage’ of her, her eyes shot up to stare at Violet. Without thinking about it further, she took a step forward, her fists clenching. Apparently Kim and Pearl had seen what she was doing, since they pulled her back before she could take another step. Kim soothingly rubbed Trixie’s back, silently assuring her. Violet in turn took a step back and sat back down on Pearl’s bed. She looked genuinely scared and exasperated, something that gave Trixie little pleasure – not to say that she didn’t enjoy it.

  
“Do you even realize that you just cost Katya her job? She has been called to a disciplinary hearing next week, and is banned from even going on campus.” Trixie seethed, slightly surprised that it wasn’t until right then that she had been able to open her mouth. She wanted Violet to know what she had done and judging by how red her face went as she listened to Trixie, she had succeeded in her mission.

  
Moments passed whilst Violet didn’t answer, which prompted Trixie to huff impatiently. “You’re seriously choosing the wrong time to go fucking silent, Violet.” She warned the brunette, daring her to not respond. Suddenly, she felt another buzz go through her pocket. Growling under her breath, she reached in to pick up her phone where she was met by several missed calls and messages from Katya, whom had apparently changed her name is Trixie’s phone again. Trixie would be lying if she tried to claim that it didn’t make her heart sting slightly.

  
**Kissya** : _Trixie, don’t go there just leave her alone._

  
**Kissya** : _I mean it, it’s not going to do any good and I don’t need you two to get in a fight that leads to me getting into any more trouble._

  
**Kissya** : _(4) missed calls._

  
Trixie whirled around and glared at Kim. “You told her?” she seethed, rolling her eyes as a blush crept onto Kim’s cheeks. “I had to, she should know that you were literally set to murder Violet.” Kim murmured, and Trixie had no energy left in her to start questioning how Kim had even gotten a hold of Katya’s number.

  
She turned back to Violet and noticed Pearl walking over to sit beside her now crying friend. “So, you’re on her side now?” Trixie sneered as Pearl soothingly rubbed Violet’s shoulder as she bawled. Pearl looked up at her, an unreadable expression on her face. “I’m not on either of your sides’. She knows that she did something wrong, but she’s still my friend.” Pearl explained, not tearing her gaze away from Trixie’s.

  
“She’s your friend too, so I realize how much this must hurt for you.” Her blonde friend continued, a sympathetic look on her face as Trixie’s eyes began to tear up. Violet looked up and nodded, her red eyes blinking quickly to prevent the inevitable irritation that came from crying too hard. “I never wanted to hurt you Trix, I will make this right.” It was the most genuine Violet had ever sounded, yet her words still caused Trixie to tremble with anger. Violet had done too much, there was no coming back from that.  
“You just cost Katya her job and me my girlfriend, so you can take your apology and shove it up your ass.” Trixie growled before she set out for the door, she couldn’t look at any of them anymore. “Go fuck yourself.” She added just before she opened the door and headed outside.

  
This time, nobody followed her. For what reason, Trixie didn’t even care. She just picked up her phone again and typed as she stomped down the hallway:

  
**To: Kissya** : _It’s all good_.

 

* * *

 

  
Katya sighed as she read Trixie’s text again, for probably the hundredth time. She hadn’t seen her girlfriend since that night, which she knew was for the best – yet, that thought didn’t exactly help her as she laid awake at night, wondering if she had made the right decision. Her and Trixie’s relationship had been incredibly complicated from the get go, the fact that it had taken that long for something like this to happen was truly an amazing thing.

  
As she prepared that morning to go see her headmaster, she had forced Justin to stay over with her the previous night. She couldn’t handle being alone as she awaited her fate. As Katya straightened her simple, black dress and picked away some fuzz that had caught onto it, she could feel her hands shiver under the long, flowy sleeves. “I know you think I had this coming, but do you have any final words of encouragement, mama’?” Katya joked, her smirk not quite reaching her worried eyes. Justin strolled out into her hallway, where she stood, and cocked his head to the side. “I never thought you deserved this, babe. Just… Let this be what it needs to be, you know we got you no matter what happens.”

  
Justin words stuck with her as she got into her car, drove down to campus and walked into the headmaster’s office. The mental image she had of his voice and Trixie’s voice was all that stopped her from crying as she saw a few of her colleagues and headmaster Kindle sitting in a circle around his desk, where he was sat. “Katya, come in.” Kindle greeted her sternly, gesturing towards the one empty seat in the circle of occupied chairs. She smiled nervously and sat down, instantly crossing one of her lean legs over the other.

  
“Nice day outside, huh?” Katya chuckled nervously, face almost immediately falling as she noticed that none of her colleagues acknowledged her joke.

  
“Hm, let’s get right to it, shall we? Ms. Zamolodchikova, you face quite serious allegations. Allegations that were put forward by a concerned student of ours regarding another student. I want to know what your stance on this is?” Kindle asked sternly, his small eyes gazing over Katya as she fidgeted in her seat.

  
She took a deep breath to collect her thoughts, knowing that this was where she had to decide for herself what she needed to do. She could tell the truth and for sure lose her job, or she could lie and hope that Kindle didn’t see right through her. She knew what the mature thing to do would be, but knowingly throwing her career away was not something she was about to do. “I have done nothing to compromise the work I do for you here, I certainly have not been taking advantage of a student – which is what I have been accused of.”

  
Katya had been vague enough to avoid answering the question of whether or not she had actually slept with a student, yet she suspected that Kindle was not satisfied with her response. His thick face scrunched together as she spoke, stopping Katya from saying anything else. “I think we both know there’s more to this story, Ms. Zamolodchikova.” Kindle pointed out whilst glancing at each of her colleagues, receiving approving nods from each of them. Katya had never hated them as much as she did at that moment.  
Katya’s heart nearly stopped as she watched them evaluate her, yet she couldn’t find the courage to answer them. “However, the student that accused you has since revoked her claims. She said that she was angry you haven’t been grading her fairly over the semester, so – she has requested that she would be removed from your class and offers her apologies.” Kindle continued, Katya’s jaw dropping at his words. Kindle had apparently wanted to make her sweat, but Trixie evidently had made Violet sweat even more so. “What consequences is the student facing?” a seemingly ancient co-worker of Katya’s asked, his grey hair matching his monotone voice. “She will receive a warning, I have not worked out all of the details yet.” Kindle dismissed him. “This case took an unexpected turn, to say the least.”

  
“What does that mean for me?” Katya asked, finally having been able to find her voice.

  
“Of course, that means you are free to return to campus. Although I won’t have to remind you that we will be keeping an eye on you, Ms. Zamolodchikova. If we catch you showcasing any form of inappropriate behaviour towards a student, then that is it.” The headmaster sternly warned her.

  
Katya then realized that even though Violet had managed to salvage the mess she had made for the time being, there could still be troubles ahead. She was in the clear now, but what would it mean for Katya’s future work? Would she be able to continue on whilst every single faculty member was watching her like a hawk?

 

* * *

 

  
Trixie strolled around campus, alone for once as she had just finished one of her classes. She knew that Katya’s disciplinary hearing was meant to have been a few days ago. Trixie had texted her, trying to find out how it had gone but had heard nothing back. For some reason, she found herself wandering towards Katya’s building, she had walked inside and headed towards her office without even realizing that Katya probably wasn’t even there. Yet, when she got there the door was left slightly ajar and Trixie could smell the sweet, flowery perfume she had come to associate with Katya. Of course, that could have been left from before, but the smell of peppermint tea was what sealed the deal. Katya was there. Trixie knocked on the door softly before she stepped inside, a huge grin on her face.

  
Katya sat down on her office chair, rummaging through her drawers. On her desk were several moving boxes, the mere sight of them enough to knock Trixie back. She was leaving. Katya was leaving her. “W-what are you doing?” Trixie mumbled, tears welling up in her eyes when Katya did not acknowledge her at first. The older woman kept tossing stuff into her boxes, a solemn expression on her face. “I’m sorry Trixie.” She replied softly, and closed the drawer with a sigh as she leaned back in her seat and looked over at the younger blonde. Katya gestured for her to close the door, which she did absentmindedly before she headed towards Katya’s chair.

  
“Did they fire you?” Trixie asked, guilt immediately flooding through her system.

  
Katya stood up in front of Trixie, reaching forward to brush her long, curly hair behind her shoulder. She shivered as the Russian woman touched her, damning herself with how obvious she was. “No, baby, they didn’t.” Katya replied, turning her hands so that they landed on Trixie’s waist, whom was very confused at the moment. If Katya hadn’t been fired, then why was she packing her things? Evidently her confused expression came across, as Katya squeezed her waist lightly and smiled.

  
“This is for the best. I need a chance to figure out what I really want with my career, and you need a chance to live without any of this weighing you down. You asked me once if I would ever leave you, and I promised you that I wouldn’t.” Katya started, interrupted by Trixie shaking her head.

  
“You did promise me, so you won’t. You can’t leave.”

  
Katya cocked her head to the side, drawing Trixie even closer to her. “I’m not leaving you, but I am leaving this place. I want you to get a chance to know what you want without me. You are so young Trixie, you need to see every aspect of your life before you decide to be with me or not.” Trixie couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Katya was leaving? It seemed unrealistic to her, illogical even. She wasn’t anything without her, and what they had. Every obstacle they had faced had been dealt with, surely this would not be any different.

  
“B-but where would you go? Am I just going to pretend to live my life when I really just want to be with you? That’s not fair.” Trixie grabbed a hold of Katya’s hands that were placed on her waist, not pushing her away and not drawing her closer. It was a perfect representation of how she felt internally, all she knew was that there was something within her that didn’t have the will to fight anymore. She couldn’t handle this any further than she already had.

  
“I know it’s not fair, but it’s for the best. We will keep in touch, I am always just a phone call away. If you decide that you want to be with me, then I want you to tell me that. If not, then you don’t have to tell me anything – but I do want you to take your time.” Katya explained, seemingly both satisfied and sad as Trixie nodded along.

  
Before Katya was able to say anything else, Trixie stepped closer to her and leaned forward to close the distance between them. She needed to feel Katya against her one last time, and the older woman thankfully did not protest as their mouths danced together. Trixie slipped her tongue into Katya’s mouth, her hands drawing behind Katya’s neck and tugged on her curly hair. The sudden dominance of Trixie’s hands elicited a moan from Katya’s lips.

  
Clothes flew everywhere, the moving boxes on Katya’s desk moved around to make room for their bare bodies. The need to feel each other surpassed any logical thought that might have entered Trixie’s head before she had kissed the older blonde woman.

  
It was much later when they had both managed to come down from their high, both women were laying down on the floor, Katya’s leg sprawled across Trixie’s thighs, her arm clutching over her stomach. “I should go.” Katya whispered, her hot breath on Trixie’s neck.

  
“Me too.” Trixie agreed, her fuller body not agreeing with her as she just drew Katya closer. She didn’t want her to leave. She couldn’t. However, they finally got dressed and left Katya’s office together, which seemed oddly poetic. Trixie helped carry one of Katya’s moving boxes, she could see how the older woman peered around the campus, trying to take everything in.

  
Trixie decided for herself that since the older woman was leaving either way, she would take a chance and lean in to place a kiss onto Katya’s temple. Surprisingly enough, Katya’s simply smiled in return and leaned into Trixie’s touch. Trixie could spot Kim and Violet from a distance, but ignored them. She could talk to Kim later, she needed to spend as much time with Katya as she could.

  
As they made it onto the parking lot, they quickly located Katya’s car. Her parking had always been crooked as hell, this time was no exception. Trixie huffed, shaking her head as she helped Katya pack her boxes into the car. When it was time for her to get in, Trixie took the opportunity to draw her closer to her own body one final time, their lips meeting in a sloppy kiss. “Bye, Trixie. I love you.” Katya whispered against her lips, making Trixie’s heart sting once more. “I love you too.”

 

* * *

 

As Katya drove away, Trixie’s head spun. How was she supposed to do this? For some reason, everything that Katya said made sense. They both had things to figure out for themselves, yet the thought of the Russian blonde leaving left a gap in her heart that she knew would be impossible to fill. Only time could tell what would happen, but Trixie was confident that it was not the last time she would see the cooky, Russian professor.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, as you may have noticed - this was the last chapter of Geronimo. I was originally planning on dragging (no pun intended) this out for a few more chapters, but I will not for a few reasons - the first being that I simply feel like it needs to be done. I also am sooo busy at work, for which I sit in front of a computer literally all day. So, when I get home really the last thing I want to do is sit down at a computer again, which is why I haven't really had time to focus on this fic. You guys have been so amazing throughout this process, I am so touched by all of your support and kind words - it means so much. Without getting too sappy, to the big question - will there be an epilogue of Geronimo? YES. There will be a three part fic which will play out after Trixie is done with colleage. How that will play out, weeeell - nobody knows. It will be up soon enough, in the mean time you can look out for one shots that I will post and if you are into TWD fanfiction then check out some of my stuff there (I will be exporting some of my works onto Ao3)  
> Before I ramble too much (I'm nervous that this will not be recieved so well, yelp) thank you again and I hoped that you enjoyed!


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